Someone asked...

Why is the "r" word offensive to me?

That "r" word, for those not in the circle of those that deal with the word on a regular basis, is "retarded" or "retard".

And here are my thoughts on the subject... I hope you'll share your own responses in the comments!

For me, it's as simple as- Would you like it if someone messed up and said "That's so (your name)" or even more generic, "that's so 28 yr old girl". Or "that's so tennis players" or whatever! It's just not something ANYONE would want to be categorized into. So why say "that's so retarded"?

It's just not nice no matter how they justify it.

Some people justify "if I was to say "that's so Meredith" while you're sitting there and say it joking you would laugh". Ok, maybe I would. But would I also be hurt? Probably (even if it's just a little)! And even when "said in jest" you're saying it about a person who is NOT there and who you do NOT know. And who does NOT know it's in jest if they happen to overhear it (or their parents!)

And don't get me started on people that would say it right to someone's face. Yikes.

We have laws about hate language against people of different cultures, colors, and gender preferences. But the ones that can't speak up for themselves seem to be overlooked all too often.

If you're one of the many, MANY people that feel that parents of children that are labeled as 'mentally retarded' are hyper-sensitive to this subject, I suggest you think about if your own child was disabled in a car accident and came home with brain injury. A new diagnosis of mental retardation. And you go out and hear someone in the car next to YOU say "man, I'm glad *I* don't have a retarded kid". I bet you might be a little sensitive to it too...

Micah will be released soon :)

Mike expects they'll be released around 11 this morning- just a little bit from now!

Please pray that Mike can get some rest today, that Micah can HEAL well and not be in pain, and DRINK well. Pray that Kristopher and Emma and Brianna will be 'extra forgiving' of the fussy little boy that's coming home. And pray that the adjustment for our friend 'N' will go well when he comes this evening. We're looking forward to having the family all together and a little extra as well :)

Update 5pm

Micah's lungs aren't sounding so great and his breathing is just a little labored, but otherwise he is doing great. /he drank a bottle of apple juice (thickened!) and 2 jars of babyfood. He's also doing ok on oral pain meds tho he's still somewhat miserable.

Waiting things out a bit to see if we need to start nebulizer treatments, but Micah got 'unhooked' and went for a walk in the hallway and that really lifted his spirits and hopefully will help the breathing too.

Mike went down to get himself some dinner then Lynae and I are going to head home to take care of the kids.

Huge thank-yous to the two grandmas for taking care of the other 3 kids today!

Micah's in Recovery

He did fine, very little bleeding, and now they're waiting for the anesthesia to wear off before letting us go to him. The plan is to keep him overnight but if he's doing really well then he might be released today if we want to. Thanks for praying!

Micah's Tonsil Surgery

Micah just went in to have his tonsils and adenoids removed. It's not a high risk procedure, but anything with general anesthesia and such is a risk. Because of Micah's aspiration issues he is a little higher risk, and the reflux does as well. We are most concerned about his time in recovery and someone random going in to 'convince him to drink' and giving him a thin liquid.

Micah will be spending the night at the hospital and hopefully able to come home on Saturday morning as long as it's an uneventful night.

Thank you for praying for Micah!

I got it!

We now have a copy of our APPROVED HOMESTUDY in our hands! So glad to have it ready and done :). Now to see what God has planned for it...

• Is it for a 3 yr old little boy that we're up for match with next week?
• Was it only intended so that we would take the MAPP classes and learn some little things that will help us to better help others?
• Was it so we would have a better understanding through the MAPP classes of a specific young man that's coming to stay with us in respite for a while?
• Was it just to see if we would let our yes be YES and follow through with God's promptings?
• Was it for a future adoption down the road that isn't anywhere near being on the radar yet?

Right now, we don't know! We have let our yes be YES and we will continue walking it out!

On a side note: Saturday a 15 yr old young man is joining our family for the remainder of the school year. He's coming to us on a respite-basis and has been in our home a few weeks ago as well. This isn't something we had planned, but we are encouraged that it can be a positive experience for our family and for the young man. We do not have plans to adopt him as this is strictly respite for him and his family, but I think much of our MAPP class training has helped us to better understand him.

One month to live

Live each day like it's your last! That's the campaign that our church is just finishing up and I must say it has been really good!

But in our lives, I know we're not living like it's our last. Because we wouldn't be adopting more children, taking in other kids for respite, and living in the way we do if we were sure there wouldn't be a tomorrow (not to be confused with being sure there IS a tomorrow, because we're never assured of that...).

I thought about it a while, and I think that rather than living each day like it's my last, I have a different drive in my days. Each day I want to build on to the ones before and head toward the ones that come next. I want to touch the lives I'm supposed to touch and be still when I need to be still. I want to say YES and follow God no matter what sacrifice He might ask of me. I want to be His light here, and share him unsparingly. And more than anything... I want to BUILD the 'legacy' but not for what it will look like for my name. Rather, who might remember Christ's name because He used us.

So, I put it this way...
"Live each day like it's your last" has many great, VALID, ideas in it... but for me, I want to Live each day like it has purpose for tomorrow...

Happy Birthday Kristopher!

Today Kristopher is SIX!  We started his birthday a little early with a Tuesday night birthday party.  Who ever heard of a birthday party on a week night?  The mom who had another kid’s birthday the Friday before and has yet a different child’s surgery the Friday after!  The kids had a blast and we kept it short and sweet.

Kristopher’s friend came over after school and they love to get dressed up and play together.  They made their own pizza to share then helped make cupcakes for the party.

 

After dinner his friend’s mom and older sister came over along with another friend and his sister.  The four “big kids” had a great time playing, then eating, then playing, then opening gifts, then… playing!

The wrong question

I won't even pretend to know the first thing about fixing a car. Maybe in theory to where I can follow a conversation, and in general I know what (some) parts of the engine do so what might be the problem piece based on different scenarios... but send me to a shop and tell me to have them look at or fix something and I will quickly say NO THANKS!

Last night a light came on in my van. No idea what it was :). I was driving home so figured I'd let Mike know when I came in... and I forgot.

So this morning he left to take the kids to school and called and I got the rundown of how bad that was to leave :) Anyway, he asked me to call an auto parts place that he'll pass on his way back to the house and see if they have the machine thingy that you hook up to the car to know why it's got the light on. (like the technical terms?). So I called and I asked them. And I called him back and said "yes." Then he said I'd asked the wrong question...

How can I have asked the wrong question? They have it, isn't that what you needed to know?

Apparently not. I got the wrong idea. He doesn't want to buy one, he wants them to do it. Ok, that's what I thought in the first place... but I also didn't even know that something like that could be purchased! I thought it was something 'big' that only auto repair places had.

Then I gave up any sense of hope of being taken seriously and decided that the auto parts store doesn't know or care who I am. And I called back.

"Hi, I called just a bit ago but I found out that I asked the wrong question."

"Ok..."

"I need to know whether you have the machine thingy that you hook up to the car to tell what the check-engine light is referring to-- and if it's one that we use there."

"Yes."

Now, I could have stopped there... but I wanted to be really sure...

"So my husband can bring our car in and you'll hook it up there and find out why the light is on, it's not something that he'd buy to do at home?"

"Right, we have them both- you can do it here or buy the device."

"Ok, he wants to bring it there, can you tell me what you charge?"

I asked that last question thinking I'd be a step ahead of the game... Thinking it was a smart thing to ask.

"It's free ma'am."

Now feeling somewhat silly because he said this as if anyone in their right mind would know that... and that I now admitted that I'm married and not a 15 yr old kid calling for their dad!

"Oh, great... thanks."

And so I returned the call to my husband and told him that I'd admitted my own car-stupidity and called the guy back to ask the right question (and threw in a 'wrong' one too!). Mike is now headed over to have it checked. Hopefully it's nothing major!

A little story

about us.

Kinda neat :) and thought I'd share.

Thank you Mary for writing such a nice post about our family!

http://www.everyonehasagift.com/index.html?entry=the-gift-of-an-open

Some random pic’s because I’m TRYING to blog more :)

Kristopher went to the office with Mike, but here’s a few sweetheart shots of the 4 kids at the house right now…

 

Emma actually looked at me, looked at the camera, and SMILED!! I think that’s the first time she’s smiled just seeing a camera! :)  (ps, thanks Mrs. L for the toy!!)

Kristopher’s ZOO trip!

I had a great time with Kristopher at the zoo on Friday!  What a great kid he is :)  We had a blast just Kristopher and 2 of his classmates and their moms!  I expected that we’d have a slew of little people we were trying to keep up with but it was great with just 3 moms and our kindergarteners.  We visited all the different country exhibits and even the petting zoo area.  The boys were well behaved and even Lynae decided to let Kristopher have the day!  She slept in the sling the first half then I turned her to look out and she looked at the animals and just hung out.  We had a great time!

Note to self:

Do not let Brianna play in the rice bin wearing cuffed pants. Now to get the vacuum for the random places she sat down later on and 'leaked' rice!

Happy Birthday Emma!

On Friday evening we had grandparents and a few little friends that we recently met through the Special Olympics Young Athletes program come over to celebrate Emma’s SEVENTH birthday with us!  We didn’t do party games but rather just opened up the play room, opened gifts, and had some cupcakes.  Emma had a nice time and was TIRED by the end, and all the kids had a great time playing :)

Happy Birthday Sweet Girl!!