2.27.2008 12:00am Kramatorsk

Although it’s midnight and I’m still awake, today was a quick day. Dave and Beverly left early to get paperwork done for the completion of their adoption and I spent the day with Neily, John Hunt, and Gary. We went to the orphanage in the morning and visited just with my kids because Lilia was outside with her groupa. Then we went to the market for some dinner things and a few staples to get Rob and Erin through the day. Then it was off to lunch at Celentano’s Pizza followed by homework for John Hunt, a shower for Neily, and some time in a good book for me. Another visit to the orphanage brought us an unusual occurrence since the playroom was locked and the key went home with someone. So I decided against getting my kids out since I’d have to sit in the back with them and Lilia was in apparent need of someone familiar. To the sadness of her new siblings, she decided to claim her banana from them then join me on the floor and take up residence on my lap. So no visit for my two this afternoon, but I made Lilia’s last visit a little more enjoyable, so that is good! I enjoyed that little bit of time with her as well. Actually, a little bit into the afternoon visit we were ushered to a back hallway with broken cribs literally stacked all around lining the entire hallway and a large birdcage on one side. It was dark, damp seeming, and will forever be referred to by myself and Lilia’s family as the “dungeon” that we spent time in. It really wasn’t all that bad but it was definitely weird!

After the visit we met up with Beverly and Dave went off to get train tickets. They had successfully gotten their birth certificate, passport, and were ready to go to Kiev! They arranged tickets for tomorrow’s noon-day train! They’re going home! I say this with great joy and excitement for them, but I also am sad to be left behind. Not because I have to spend more time here (although that’s some of it) but because it means that I won’t have their company. I have REALLY enjoyed having them here more than they can ever imagine. I have said it to them but I’m sure they think that I jest- that there is NO WAY I could have made it through this whole thing on my own without them here. They have been my lifeline and not only that, but my counsel as well. I have depended on them for medication, companionship, and an ear to listen. It has been quite an experience being in a foreign country without anyone that I really know, but having them here has made it as if I am here with great long-time friends. It’s hard to believe we met only 3 weeks ago. I know that our friendship is a lifelong bond. It’s not every day that you live with people for a week and a half only 2 weeks after meeting, but our “thrown together” relationship has been wonderful.

So… that leaves me tomorrow with an empty house but hopefully only for a day. I know that the ‘original plan’ for me was to stay here alone for the time between when Mike left and when I could take the kids home, but since it didn’t end up that way I’m not even looking forward to the time that I have to be alone for just a few days until I am back home again. I know I’ll survive and that I’m in a safe place, but it’s definitely not something I’m looking forward to. I know I’ll be pining for home even more, missing my children and my husband, and wanting to be anywhere but here. I’ve already considered the decision between a solo taxi and skipping the afternoon visits and I’m thinking I might just do one visit a day the next two days (yes, it’s only two days that I know of!) so that I don’t have to take a taxi alone at night. I’ve done it once but it was a little unnerving and especially since I don’t speak the language it was not an experience I’d like to have over and over again.

I’m hoping, though, that Thursday morning Natalia will be here and we will do some things up at the orphanage, then Friday we will get the court decree, birth certificates, and passports and be on our way back to Kiev over the weekend. I’m hoping and praying that that is how it works out! Once in Kiev there are medicals and visas to get and then I’m on my way back to the good ole U. S. A. and my family of 6.

I know I’m not strong, I’d love to just break down and I actually have on occasion, but I sure hope to make it home quickly and without too many days on my own. My sanity may depend on it!