God has been reminding me, today, how little faith we had when we prepared for our first adoption. He knew that it took a LOT of us to commit to adopting any child from overseas… the expense, the time, the paperwork, and then the UNKNOWN, the health conditions, behavioral trouble… what were we stepping in to?
God knew we wouldn’t decide on our own to adopt a 5 yr old that weighed 17 lbs, needed open heart surgery which may or may not even be possible. A child that lived her entire life in one crib and didn’t like to be touched or held or even looked at. A little girl that chewed her hands raw, ate only broth from a bottle, and smelled like… well… death.
Instead He called us over to adoption with the idea of a healthy 5 yr old with Down syndrome that walked, talked some, and was generally in a pretty good disposition. Our faith was stretched to get through the 5 month process for those ‘minimal’ needs!
God took our faith the size of a mustard seed, and walked us through the process and somehow He grew a TREE. He brought home the sick little girl of the first description, the healthy little girl of the second description, and in the midst of all of that, added another 3 children through adoption and 2 more through birth!
God knew our faith was small. TINY. Yet, He grew the tree that He had planned anyway!
Now, once again, I think my faith is looking like this:
Yes, that’s an actual mustard seed.
Is the faith of a mustard seed a GREAT faith? Knowing that BIG things will be done even from its small small start?
Or is the faith of a mustard seed referring to faith the actual SIZE of the mustard seed? Tiny, miniscule, but still enough to make a TREE one day?
No matter how you see it, I want that faith.
The faith that can know that my own existence is miniscule. My own reach is small. But I know that I serve a God SO BIG that through Him, the impact can be great. My faith can be multiplied. Be used for His purpose.
We have a lot of changes happening in our home and family right now. A lot of things that I can’t make completely public yet. I see them as good change. Through this time we’ve been given a greater vision and a stronger purpose for our family “mission”. Change is still hard, though. Just about every area of our lives is being touched by these impending changes, and we need that faith that knows that God is IN this. God is LEADING this. God knew this from the beginning. And most of all, God has a plan for it all that will bring Him glory!!
As you think of our family, please lift us up in prayer. We ask for God’s discernment, His timing, and His direction.
((PS: No, we are not adopting again))