I bought a 4-pk of Ghirardelli (sp?) chocolate 'mugs' filled with goodies for Mike to give away at Christmas to a few people. We had one left. It's after Christmas... it was calling my name!
So, I unwrapped it and heated some milk in the mug. I popped a peppermint in my mouth from the container then realized it was a HARD peppermint, not a soft one. So, in all my brilliance, I decided I'd have PEPPERMINT hot Ghirardelli chocolate... YUM.
And I spit the peppermint out into the cup of hot milk.
And it splashed right back up in my face and felt like someone had BIT my nose! OW! LOL
So... you all were close, but no cigar. Except for Chris, because after his comment, he probably deserves the cigar :)
Blessings, and goodnight... tired momma is off to bed (and yes, my nose feels better!)
The Cornish Family... Chasing God's calling...
Tuesday, January 11, 2011
The results are in...
I'll start with the best news first!
Aleksa's C-spine x-ray (looking for abnormalities in spacing of the neck vertebrae that people w/ Ds are at risk for) looks FINE!
Aleksa's bloodwork is also fine!
And of course the echo tech had told us that she didn't see any PDA or ASD's while we were there, so it sounds like she's clear on all fronts :)
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Wesley's Chest x-ray was clear and no fluid!
Wesley's bloodwork was "up and down but nothing grossly abnormal". I'll take that as good :)
His abdominal x-ray showed "moderate amounts of backed-up stool" which we expected (and have already begun to treat).
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Lynae's bloodwork looked "mostly" ok, except...
Lynae is slightly anemic. (We'll start her on some Iron)
Lynae's liver function panel showed "slightly elevated" results. She told me the numbers, and depending on what "slightly" means, I guess that's true. They are significantly more than the 'general' number that's given as normal.
So what does that mean? Hopefully, it's a fluke. We're praying that it is the case. There were two tests run and both were elevated though, so it's likely not just a fluke. It's possible that it was situational... she had just gotten sick or just gotten better (this result is actually from OCTOBER, but just got sent to the Dr since we did the "second half" of this bloodwork with the new kids this week. I'm GLAD I didn't get that news in October tho!).
As far as what to do from here, Lynae has a well visit already scheduled for Thursday for her 15 month checkup. We'll talk more then, but our pediatrician suggested a repeat blood test and an ultrasound of the liver as well as a referral to GI.
There's all sorts of "what this could mean" and we are ok just going with what it does mean for now... which is that we need to do a little more investigating.
The doctor commented that she had to check to make sure she had the right child's paperwork in front of her because it wasn't the Cornish kid that she expected to see unusual reports come back on. It was, though... and we'll see where we need to go from here!
Thank you for praying with us for Lynae!
Aleksa's C-spine x-ray (looking for abnormalities in spacing of the neck vertebrae that people w/ Ds are at risk for) looks FINE!
Aleksa's bloodwork is also fine!
And of course the echo tech had told us that she didn't see any PDA or ASD's while we were there, so it sounds like she's clear on all fronts :)
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Wesley's Chest x-ray was clear and no fluid!
Wesley's bloodwork was "up and down but nothing grossly abnormal". I'll take that as good :)
His abdominal x-ray showed "moderate amounts of backed-up stool" which we expected (and have already begun to treat).
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Lynae's bloodwork looked "mostly" ok, except...
Lynae is slightly anemic. (We'll start her on some Iron)
Lynae's liver function panel showed "slightly elevated" results. She told me the numbers, and depending on what "slightly" means, I guess that's true. They are significantly more than the 'general' number that's given as normal.
So what does that mean? Hopefully, it's a fluke. We're praying that it is the case. There were two tests run and both were elevated though, so it's likely not just a fluke. It's possible that it was situational... she had just gotten sick or just gotten better (this result is actually from OCTOBER, but just got sent to the Dr since we did the "second half" of this bloodwork with the new kids this week. I'm GLAD I didn't get that news in October tho!).
As far as what to do from here, Lynae has a well visit already scheduled for Thursday for her 15 month checkup. We'll talk more then, but our pediatrician suggested a repeat blood test and an ultrasound of the liver as well as a referral to GI.
There's all sorts of "what this could mean" and we are ok just going with what it does mean for now... which is that we need to do a little more investigating.
The doctor commented that she had to check to make sure she had the right child's paperwork in front of her because it wasn't the Cornish kid that she expected to see unusual reports come back on. It was, though... and we'll see where we need to go from here!
Thank you for praying with us for Lynae!
The Malone Family
Isn't he a cute little baby?? His name will be Ethan soon, and he's just adorable! Wearing a 12 months sweatshirt and a pair of 12 months overalls in that photo (taken when I had the joy of meeting him in September), he weighed about 15 or 16 pounds at that time I would guess. So petite and tiny just like any baby should be... right? Except... that Ethan is SIX YEARS OLD.Ethan has Down syndrome and an associated issue which caused him to need a colostomy. That means that instead of digesting his food, it almost all 'runs out' of the hole in his side where he has bowel movements instead of going through his entire digestive system. People can live with this, but obviously Ethan isn't getting what he REALLY needs to be in order to have enough nutrients to learn and grow!
He is so tiny and needs surgery as well as a LOT of love and care! The Malone family is up for the challenge!
Not only are the Malones living out James 1:27 (to care for the orphans!) but Chris is a full time music minister at his church, and his beautiful wife, Mary, is a full time mom to their kids. I can speak from experience in saying that it isn't exactly an easy thing to manage a large family on a single ministry income :). Then, to do an international adoption that you know God has called you to... that takes another level of faith! And THEY HAVE IT.
Now, they need the funds. The Malones are doing a give-away on their blog of... an IPAD! Yep, one of those coveted new toys which is not only great for on the go work, but also for special needs kids! Michael has one for work and was able to bring it to Ukraine with us. We used it constantly as we were out and about, and Wesley quickly figured out that even he could 'draw' on it with his fingers on one of the apps.
Eventually, we hope to get one of these for the kids for communication and learning! Maybe we'll win it ;)
But right now I wanted to not only tell you all about the Malones and ask for prayer for their journey, but to share this opportunity to donate (they need it!) and to have the added benefit of the opportunity to be able to be entered to win this IPAD (you know you want it!) at the same time!
The Malones have an appointment this month at the SDA! HURRY!! Their give-away closes on January 22nd (a great day to be born *ahem* and I don't mind you donating whatever you planned on buying a birthday gift for me with to their adoption! LOL). A winner will be chosen on January 23rd.
You can view the Malone family give-away at http://themalonefamily.us/?p=2548
ENTER NOW! (This link should say "Ukraine Ministries of Oklahoma" when it links to paypal, and all donations are tax deductible)
Blackout
Ok, so this was 2 nights ago, but I have to write about it simply so that I remember it. I don't think I have laughed so hard, looking back at an event, in quite some time!
On Sunday night when we got back from Orlando and had dinner, we got the kids ready for bed, medicines administered, teeth brushed... and myself and 6 of the kids had just gone into the hallway where their bedrooms are. When the power started flashing I started looking at where all the kids were. It was weird... it flashed on and off about 4 times for about 1 second each on/off then went off completely. So my quick headcount had Aleksa, Micah, James, Lynae, Brianna, and I was holding Wesley. Kristopher was just a few feet behind me.
It was almost 7pm, and it was SO DARK I couldn't see my hand in front of my face. Not just because my eyes hadn't adjusted, but because there seemed to be no moonlight and it was PITCH black!
I grabbed up Lynae, knowing she would probably be the first to freak out and hoping that everyone else wouldn't follow suit. Then, I quickly and calmly said "Ok, lights out, let's get in our beds" and set one of the kids down then reached down to pick James up and put him in his bed. He wasn't very cooperative about it (tho he couldn't see to cooperate, I guess) and I zipped up his crib tent. Brianna was wimpering and I tried to get her to go sit on Micah's toddler bed (YAY, he's slept in it 3 nights and aside from falling out a few times and me finding him on the floor, he's doing great!). She didn't want to. Then, I found the next little fuzzy haired child and said "Micah, climb up on your bed." When he didn't go, I took his arm and went to help him along on his way. He let out a little exasperated "I don't want to" which sounded more like "AHILINGBAIL" and I realized with a chuckle that it wasn't Micah! Nope, it was JAMES.
So... I put the other child in my arms down (now everyone was calm thankfully, tho it was still pitch black) and I picked up James, then went and rescued Micah from James' crib! Then I put Aleksa in her bed and raised the side (She's in the adapted bed for a little while at least so there's no concern about either wandering or inappropriate behavior at night... safer that way until we know what risks there are. She has, after all, spent the last 3 years in a mental institution with girls ages 4-35...).
Michael came in about then with his computer and opened the laptop up so it illuminated the room a bit. Then off he went for flashlights and candles. Now the room with 7 kids (Kristopher had come in) was lit, but Emma was still not there. I told the kids to stay put (as if they'd want to leave into the depths of darkness...) and I went into the other room to get Emma.
I'd last seen her laying on the beanbag chair waiting for her turn to go to bed (she and Lynae's room isn't in the same hallway as the other kids). I called out to her. "Hi Emma!" Nothing. "Emma, say "mama" ". Nothing. "Emma, Hi!" Nope. Not happening. I felt along the floor with my foot, not wanting to step on her and not even knowing if she was still in that room since Michael could have grabbed her and taken her with him. I found the beanbag and reached down to find something fuzzy. A leg? No, an arm... there was a head not far from it :). I said again "Hi Emma!" and nothing. Oh well... and I picked her up and felt my way back to the kids' room.
There they were, 4 of them huddled around the computer staring at.. nothing. Just light I guess?
We decided now would be a good time to sing a song, and Kristopher went and got our Daily Devotional book which we hadn't done that day. I really like this one, by the way- 365 Veggie Devo's I think it's called, and it's 1/2 page for every day. Long enough to get a point across, short enough for my kids to pay attention :) ).
So, we sang, we read, and eventually Michael found the 3 'glowing' people thingies we have and we set one up in each of the kids' rooms. Finally... off to bed!
It was quite the adventure, I assure you! I couldn't believe just how dark it was!!
Our power was back on at about 9pm, and the house had dropped about 5 degrees without the heater on. I was cold! :)
I was SO GLAD we'd already had the kids in their PJs and ready for bed!!
One more day in the adventures of the Cornish ten! LOL
On Sunday night when we got back from Orlando and had dinner, we got the kids ready for bed, medicines administered, teeth brushed... and myself and 6 of the kids had just gone into the hallway where their bedrooms are. When the power started flashing I started looking at where all the kids were. It was weird... it flashed on and off about 4 times for about 1 second each on/off then went off completely. So my quick headcount had Aleksa, Micah, James, Lynae, Brianna, and I was holding Wesley. Kristopher was just a few feet behind me.
It was almost 7pm, and it was SO DARK I couldn't see my hand in front of my face. Not just because my eyes hadn't adjusted, but because there seemed to be no moonlight and it was PITCH black!
I grabbed up Lynae, knowing she would probably be the first to freak out and hoping that everyone else wouldn't follow suit. Then, I quickly and calmly said "Ok, lights out, let's get in our beds" and set one of the kids down then reached down to pick James up and put him in his bed. He wasn't very cooperative about it (tho he couldn't see to cooperate, I guess) and I zipped up his crib tent. Brianna was wimpering and I tried to get her to go sit on Micah's toddler bed (YAY, he's slept in it 3 nights and aside from falling out a few times and me finding him on the floor, he's doing great!). She didn't want to. Then, I found the next little fuzzy haired child and said "Micah, climb up on your bed." When he didn't go, I took his arm and went to help him along on his way. He let out a little exasperated "I don't want to" which sounded more like "AHILINGBAIL" and I realized with a chuckle that it wasn't Micah! Nope, it was JAMES.
So... I put the other child in my arms down (now everyone was calm thankfully, tho it was still pitch black) and I picked up James, then went and rescued Micah from James' crib! Then I put Aleksa in her bed and raised the side (She's in the adapted bed for a little while at least so there's no concern about either wandering or inappropriate behavior at night... safer that way until we know what risks there are. She has, after all, spent the last 3 years in a mental institution with girls ages 4-35...).
Michael came in about then with his computer and opened the laptop up so it illuminated the room a bit. Then off he went for flashlights and candles. Now the room with 7 kids (Kristopher had come in) was lit, but Emma was still not there. I told the kids to stay put (as if they'd want to leave into the depths of darkness...) and I went into the other room to get Emma.
I'd last seen her laying on the beanbag chair waiting for her turn to go to bed (she and Lynae's room isn't in the same hallway as the other kids). I called out to her. "Hi Emma!" Nothing. "Emma, say "mama" ". Nothing. "Emma, Hi!" Nope. Not happening. I felt along the floor with my foot, not wanting to step on her and not even knowing if she was still in that room since Michael could have grabbed her and taken her with him. I found the beanbag and reached down to find something fuzzy. A leg? No, an arm... there was a head not far from it :). I said again "Hi Emma!" and nothing. Oh well... and I picked her up and felt my way back to the kids' room.
There they were, 4 of them huddled around the computer staring at.. nothing. Just light I guess?
We decided now would be a good time to sing a song, and Kristopher went and got our Daily Devotional book which we hadn't done that day. I really like this one, by the way- 365 Veggie Devo's I think it's called, and it's 1/2 page for every day. Long enough to get a point across, short enough for my kids to pay attention :) ).
So, we sang, we read, and eventually Michael found the 3 'glowing' people thingies we have and we set one up in each of the kids' rooms. Finally... off to bed!
It was quite the adventure, I assure you! I couldn't believe just how dark it was!!
Our power was back on at about 9pm, and the house had dropped about 5 degrees without the heater on. I was cold! :)
I was SO GLAD we'd already had the kids in their PJs and ready for bed!!
One more day in the adventures of the Cornish ten! LOL
Monday, January 10, 2011
Weight
Last week Brianna and Micah went to the doctor and both weighted EXACTLY the same amount. 28.25 lbs.
Today I brought James to the doctor and guess what he weighs?? Yep, 28.25. WEIRD?!
I also brought Kristopher today and Aleksa's appt was last week. They are both 43 lbs!
Wesley is about 23 lbs now (gained about 1.5 lbs since his Embassy appointment) and I think he still outweighs Lynae. She goes on Thursday, but her weight I expect to be more like 17/18 lbs. I think Wesley will be catching up with Brianna, Micah, and James before Lynae is catching up with him, but you never know.
Emma's out on her own as well weighing 35 lbs.
For those of you who don't keep track of my kids' ages and such, here's a rundown:
Aleksa (8 since October)- 43 lbs
Emma (7, 8 in February)- 35 lbs
Kristopher (6, 7 in February)- 43 lbs
Wesley (5, 6 in February)- 23 lbs
Brianna (5 since last week)- 28.25lbs
James (4 since August)- 28.25lbs
**ETA: Looking at the calendar... I wrote it down on the date for NEXT week, so I have to figure out whether I have it in my HEAD right, or the CALENDAR right... Usually the calendar is right, but I was a week off in my thinking (thought I was going to be at next Tues's appointment tomorrow) while talking to her, so... who know! LOL**
Today I brought James to the doctor and guess what he weighs?? Yep, 28.25. WEIRD?!
I also brought Kristopher today and Aleksa's appt was last week. They are both 43 lbs!
Wesley is about 23 lbs now (gained about 1.5 lbs since his Embassy appointment) and I think he still outweighs Lynae. She goes on Thursday, but her weight I expect to be more like 17/18 lbs. I think Wesley will be catching up with Brianna, Micah, and James before Lynae is catching up with him, but you never know.
Emma's out on her own as well weighing 35 lbs.
For those of you who don't keep track of my kids' ages and such, here's a rundown:
Aleksa (8 since October)- 43 lbs
Emma (7, 8 in February)- 35 lbs
Kristopher (6, 7 in February)- 43 lbs
Wesley (5, 6 in February)- 23 lbs
Brianna (5 since last week)- 28.25lbs
James (4 since August)- 28.25lbs
Micah (4 since September)- 28.25lbs
Lynae (1 since September)- soon to see, about 17/18 lbs...
I also got two phone calls today, one that allowed me to schedule Aleksa to go to Hope Haven, our 'localish' Down syndrome clinic (in Jacksonville) THIS MONTH! They usually have a 6 month wait but James was scheduled for March, Micah for August so we were on their cancellation list. Though I didn't want to move those two up (due to my desire not to leave Aleksa and Wesley for an entire day or to try to wrangle them both during another child's 3 1/2 hours of appointments...) I asked if I could 'add an extra'. I'm glad I could!
THEN, I got a neurology call for Wesley. That was QUICK! We only went to the pediatrician on the 6th (last Thursday) and he now has an appointment for THIS Thursday! I'm excited to get the ball rolling quickly for him!
**ETA: Looking at the calendar... I wrote it down on the date for NEXT week, so I have to figure out whether I have it in my HEAD right, or the CALENDAR right... Usually the calendar is right, but I was a week off in my thinking (thought I was going to be at next Tues's appointment tomorrow) while talking to her, so... who know! LOL**
Oh POOP.
Nope, not swearing, we have POOP!
Never been so excited for poop, and my mom will smack me when she reads this (because she, understandably so, wasn't as excited about it!).
Wesley has some issues with constipation. Like... I've never had him poop any 'normal' or real amount on his own. It has had to be assisted with once, and then when we came home we began Miralax powder (a full capful daily) and he still hadn't gone since beginning it on the 6th. Today... We have poop!
It also just happened to coincide with the flu shot appointments that I had for James, Kristopher, and Emma... so my mom happened to be at the house with Wesley, Lynae, and Aleksa when it 'broke loose'. My mom offered to stay an hour and a half and keep the kids longer so I could pick up the other 4 from school without having to load the car (and the boy that keeps pooping everywhere)... but I suggested that she go home and change her OWN pants... that he pooped on! Poor mom. First babysitting time for Wesley and he pooped all over her!
In other (not so poopy) news, Wesley and Aleksa were both good (and of course Lynae was) for her, and the morning went without hitch for her and for my doctor's appts for the other kids. The rest of the day we have NO PLANS except for school pickup, which is really unheard of! YAY! :)
This week promises to be much like the last, and really next week will be too. We have at least 4 appointments each week, several for multiple kids. Today 3 went to the pediatrician (this was visits 6,7, and 8 to the ped so far in 2011 and general doctor visits number 16, 17, and 18 this year). Tomorrow we have a school rep meeting, Wednesday an Endo appointment for Brianna, Thursday Lynae's 15 month checkup (yes, she's 16 mos but I was gone and wanted to take her for shots myself). Next week we have an ENT follow up for Brianna, GI for James, and shots for Brianna, Wesley, and Aleksa. Sounds like fun, right?? :)
Thankfully, after January our doctor's appointments will DRASTICALLY decrease! February is still a bit busy but after that there's only one or two a month-- or maybe none at all :)
We are planning and getting ready for my sister's wedding in March! So yesterday we went to Orlando and exchanged a gift Mike bought me (not because I didn't like it... but because I already had it...). Each time we've had a baby or adopted, he's given me a Willow Tree figurine. For Christmas he gave me a boy and a girl :). Now there are 8 little people and 2 parents on our "FAMILY" shelf in the living room. I love having a full shelf :)
We also bought supplies for the shower as well as tights and socks for some of the kids (on clearance :) ) to wear with their adorable little outfits (Elizabeth bought them for the kids for Christmas!). This was our first family outing with all 10 of us aside from church. It went well, the kids did great, and though there were stressful moments of (Wesley especially) the kids being antsy about waiting on something, it went as well as can be imagined.
One of the definite high points (or... LOW...) of the day was when I took the girls to the restroom at Target. I asked Aleksa if she was done (she hadn't peed) and she hopped right off the toilet. Unfortunately, she had JUST started peeing! So, now there was pee ALL over the place. On the seat, the floor, her pants... UGH! I plopped her back on the toilet to finish then cleaned her up as best as could be done in a public restroom with no diaper bag then had her stand away in "time out" for "peeskaing" on the floor. (peeska is Russian for pee). ICK! I dabbed at anything wet on the floor without getting too gross myself and cleaned off the toilet seat so Brianna go... Who knows what else was already on that floor... but it was certainly already far from clean.
Anyway, we purchased a new pair of pants at WalMart (because I didn't have any with me) that were cheap and now they are my diaper bag pair! And, I know to be VERY careful before asking if she's done when she's going potty. After all, I don't really want to wash her shoes every time I take her to the bathroom! On a side note, I don't think she understands the concept of "all done?" I know Emma still doesn't... I think she simply took my extended hands as a "get off now" and not as a question. She didn't seem to be intentional about peeing everywhere.
And so, the many adventures of the Cornish ten continues... if it's not one thing, it certainly is another!
Never been so excited for poop, and my mom will smack me when she reads this (because she, understandably so, wasn't as excited about it!).
Wesley has some issues with constipation. Like... I've never had him poop any 'normal' or real amount on his own. It has had to be assisted with once, and then when we came home we began Miralax powder (a full capful daily) and he still hadn't gone since beginning it on the 6th. Today... We have poop!
It also just happened to coincide with the flu shot appointments that I had for James, Kristopher, and Emma... so my mom happened to be at the house with Wesley, Lynae, and Aleksa when it 'broke loose'. My mom offered to stay an hour and a half and keep the kids longer so I could pick up the other 4 from school without having to load the car (and the boy that keeps pooping everywhere)... but I suggested that she go home and change her OWN pants... that he pooped on! Poor mom. First babysitting time for Wesley and he pooped all over her!
In other (not so poopy) news, Wesley and Aleksa were both good (and of course Lynae was) for her, and the morning went without hitch for her and for my doctor's appts for the other kids. The rest of the day we have NO PLANS except for school pickup, which is really unheard of! YAY! :)
This week promises to be much like the last, and really next week will be too. We have at least 4 appointments each week, several for multiple kids. Today 3 went to the pediatrician (this was visits 6,7, and 8 to the ped so far in 2011 and general doctor visits number 16, 17, and 18 this year). Tomorrow we have a school rep meeting, Wednesday an Endo appointment for Brianna, Thursday Lynae's 15 month checkup (yes, she's 16 mos but I was gone and wanted to take her for shots myself). Next week we have an ENT follow up for Brianna, GI for James, and shots for Brianna, Wesley, and Aleksa. Sounds like fun, right?? :)
Thankfully, after January our doctor's appointments will DRASTICALLY decrease! February is still a bit busy but after that there's only one or two a month-- or maybe none at all :)
We are planning and getting ready for my sister's wedding in March! So yesterday we went to Orlando and exchanged a gift Mike bought me (not because I didn't like it... but because I already had it...). Each time we've had a baby or adopted, he's given me a Willow Tree figurine. For Christmas he gave me a boy and a girl :). Now there are 8 little people and 2 parents on our "FAMILY" shelf in the living room. I love having a full shelf :)
We also bought supplies for the shower as well as tights and socks for some of the kids (on clearance :) ) to wear with their adorable little outfits (Elizabeth bought them for the kids for Christmas!). This was our first family outing with all 10 of us aside from church. It went well, the kids did great, and though there were stressful moments of (Wesley especially) the kids being antsy about waiting on something, it went as well as can be imagined.
One of the definite high points (or... LOW...) of the day was when I took the girls to the restroom at Target. I asked Aleksa if she was done (she hadn't peed) and she hopped right off the toilet. Unfortunately, she had JUST started peeing! So, now there was pee ALL over the place. On the seat, the floor, her pants... UGH! I plopped her back on the toilet to finish then cleaned her up as best as could be done in a public restroom with no diaper bag then had her stand away in "time out" for "peeskaing" on the floor. (peeska is Russian for pee). ICK! I dabbed at anything wet on the floor without getting too gross myself and cleaned off the toilet seat so Brianna go... Who knows what else was already on that floor... but it was certainly already far from clean.
Anyway, we purchased a new pair of pants at WalMart (because I didn't have any with me) that were cheap and now they are my diaper bag pair! And, I know to be VERY careful before asking if she's done when she's going potty. After all, I don't really want to wash her shoes every time I take her to the bathroom! On a side note, I don't think she understands the concept of "all done?" I know Emma still doesn't... I think she simply took my extended hands as a "get off now" and not as a question. She didn't seem to be intentional about peeing everywhere.
And so, the many adventures of the Cornish ten continues... if it's not one thing, it certainly is another!
Saturday, January 08, 2011
Fun time!
We had a great day yesterday! I'll start with the fun part...
Brianna's Birthday Party!
We had just grandparents and one other family come to celebrate with us, but it was perfect-- not to big, not too small :). Our guests just happen to have a little girl with a little extra 'something' and she will be 5 in just a few months. We all go to church together and our kids are in the same nursery classes, but we, as adults, don't get together all that much. All six of them were able to come and we had a great time!
One of their daughters made the day extra special by bringing Brianna's Birthday cake! It was BEAUTIFUL! It was a castle with turrets and everything. Pictures to come... but I didn't take any so I'll have to wait for them off of one of the other 4 cameras that was going :). Brianna loved her princess cake and is right now eating breakfast with three little princesses looking at her that were cake decorations!
Since Brianna's birthday is so close to Christmas, we waited almost a week after her birthday before the party. Last night we did pizza, cake, and just played for a bit. Brianna had a GREAT TIME, and I think the other kids (and "big kids" and adults ;) ) had a good time too! We enjoyed being able to spend the time celebrating Brianna and share time with other adults as well :)
Now... before the birthday party... of course there was quite a bit of picking-up-the-house, wrapping her gifts, getting the highchairs and such into the dining room... but we spent the morning doing all kinds of "fun stuff" for Wesley and Aleksa (and a bit for Lynae too).
We started the morning off at 7am driving to pick up the sweet young lady that made Brianna's birthday cake. By 8 we were pulling up at the hospital and registering for Aleksa's echocardiogram (heart ultrasound), a C-spine complete series to check her neck (kids w/ Ds are at risk to have a bigger spacing between vertebrae around the c-1 c-2 and this could cause paralysis if untreated and injured so it's a normal screening), and a chest x-ray for Wesley (to get a baseline and see what his lungs look like, if there's fluid- he sounds rattley) as well as an abdominal x-ray to see just how backed up his little backside is.
Since x-rays are really hard to accomplish with extra kids along (they can't go in the room), I was VERY glad to have help! We did Aleksa's series first, and after they said to me "we'll get a few people to hold her... kids like to wiggle." I replied with "let's see how it goes first. I had a feeling she'd do just FINE! And? SHE DID! She fussed a bit, but nothing major and she did it when we needed her to open her mouth, so it was great ;) My friend kept the other two kids in the waiting room.
Next was her echo which we all went back for and even though I'm pretty sure they're not allowed to tell me this... they don't see ANY PDA or ASD! YAY!! Those are what were questionable before so that sounds good :)
After that were Wesley's x-rays which he didn't care for but tolerated. They weren't too bad, though we didn't hear results on any of the x-rays.
Since it was only 10am when we finished with all of that... we started in on the next set of medical prods... bloodwork. For those wondering, we did a CBC (complete blood count), CMP (complete metabolic panel), TSH and T4 (thyroid function) and... maybe something else? On both kids. I also had 'leftover' bloodwork for Lynae since before I left for UA I was able to get only 1/2 of her labs drawn since she's so tiny. They were just doing a CBC and thyroid panel since she's so tiny and Brianna's thyroid requires monitoring (though that's probably related to her having Ds, we still wanted to check that there's nothing 'going on' with Lynae in that area).
Lynae didn't cry! She just sat there, let them draw, and went off on her way! Aleksa didn't fight, though she fussed about it. She kicked her legs but didn't move her arm a bit. Both were good girls!
Wesley, well, he bit me. HARD. Then, instead of holding his upper arm, I held his lower arm and his FACE. Since he has such rigid spasticity, we had to wait for him to relax and extend his arm, then as they did the blood draw he was only trying to bend his arm while she did the draw. I didn't have to do much except keep him from bending. He did great too, though it took 2 sticks for his.
After ALL of that, we drove the child wrangler (and HUGE HELPER!) back home, ran through to get taco's and went to the church. There we ate quick with Michael then traded off cars with him-- installing the carseats that were in the minivan (with me) into the 15 passenger.
THEN, off to Wal-Mart to pick up plates and drinks for the birthday party as well as some SHOES for our GIRL (Aleksa has been wearing Wesley's shoes for the last week and between her haircut and the boy shoes, well, she didn't stand a chance of being taken for a girl even with a pink shirt on...
We ran through there and back up to the school to pick up the other 5 kiddos from school.
Then started the house pick-up and get-ready for the birthday party!
It's been a BUSY two days, but last night we folded into bed at 8:30! And slept (mostly, despite a few child-wakings) until 7am :).
Today Michael is headed to a funeral in the afternoon, but most of the day is just going to be relaxing and playing with the kids.
A HUGE THANK YOU to April for coming with me yesterday AND for the beautiful birthday cake! You made my day and you made Brianna's birthday extra special with the cake and your whole family by coming to celebrate with us!
Brianna's Birthday Party!
We had just grandparents and one other family come to celebrate with us, but it was perfect-- not to big, not too small :). Our guests just happen to have a little girl with a little extra 'something' and she will be 5 in just a few months. We all go to church together and our kids are in the same nursery classes, but we, as adults, don't get together all that much. All six of them were able to come and we had a great time!
One of their daughters made the day extra special by bringing Brianna's Birthday cake! It was BEAUTIFUL! It was a castle with turrets and everything. Pictures to come... but I didn't take any so I'll have to wait for them off of one of the other 4 cameras that was going :). Brianna loved her princess cake and is right now eating breakfast with three little princesses looking at her that were cake decorations!
Since Brianna's birthday is so close to Christmas, we waited almost a week after her birthday before the party. Last night we did pizza, cake, and just played for a bit. Brianna had a GREAT TIME, and I think the other kids (and "big kids" and adults ;) ) had a good time too! We enjoyed being able to spend the time celebrating Brianna and share time with other adults as well :)
Now... before the birthday party... of course there was quite a bit of picking-up-the-house, wrapping her gifts, getting the highchairs and such into the dining room... but we spent the morning doing all kinds of "fun stuff" for Wesley and Aleksa (and a bit for Lynae too).
We started the morning off at 7am driving to pick up the sweet young lady that made Brianna's birthday cake. By 8 we were pulling up at the hospital and registering for Aleksa's echocardiogram (heart ultrasound), a C-spine complete series to check her neck (kids w/ Ds are at risk to have a bigger spacing between vertebrae around the c-1 c-2 and this could cause paralysis if untreated and injured so it's a normal screening), and a chest x-ray for Wesley (to get a baseline and see what his lungs look like, if there's fluid- he sounds rattley) as well as an abdominal x-ray to see just how backed up his little backside is.
Since x-rays are really hard to accomplish with extra kids along (they can't go in the room), I was VERY glad to have help! We did Aleksa's series first, and after they said to me "we'll get a few people to hold her... kids like to wiggle." I replied with "let's see how it goes first. I had a feeling she'd do just FINE! And? SHE DID! She fussed a bit, but nothing major and she did it when we needed her to open her mouth, so it was great ;) My friend kept the other two kids in the waiting room.
Next was her echo which we all went back for and even though I'm pretty sure they're not allowed to tell me this... they don't see ANY PDA or ASD! YAY!! Those are what were questionable before so that sounds good :)
After that were Wesley's x-rays which he didn't care for but tolerated. They weren't too bad, though we didn't hear results on any of the x-rays.
Since it was only 10am when we finished with all of that... we started in on the next set of medical prods... bloodwork. For those wondering, we did a CBC (complete blood count), CMP (complete metabolic panel), TSH and T4 (thyroid function) and... maybe something else? On both kids. I also had 'leftover' bloodwork for Lynae since before I left for UA I was able to get only 1/2 of her labs drawn since she's so tiny. They were just doing a CBC and thyroid panel since she's so tiny and Brianna's thyroid requires monitoring (though that's probably related to her having Ds, we still wanted to check that there's nothing 'going on' with Lynae in that area).
Lynae didn't cry! She just sat there, let them draw, and went off on her way! Aleksa didn't fight, though she fussed about it. She kicked her legs but didn't move her arm a bit. Both were good girls!
Wesley, well, he bit me. HARD. Then, instead of holding his upper arm, I held his lower arm and his FACE. Since he has such rigid spasticity, we had to wait for him to relax and extend his arm, then as they did the blood draw he was only trying to bend his arm while she did the draw. I didn't have to do much except keep him from bending. He did great too, though it took 2 sticks for his.
After ALL of that, we drove the child wrangler (and HUGE HELPER!) back home, ran through to get taco's and went to the church. There we ate quick with Michael then traded off cars with him-- installing the carseats that were in the minivan (with me) into the 15 passenger.
THEN, off to Wal-Mart to pick up plates and drinks for the birthday party as well as some SHOES for our GIRL (Aleksa has been wearing Wesley's shoes for the last week and between her haircut and the boy shoes, well, she didn't stand a chance of being taken for a girl even with a pink shirt on...
We ran through there and back up to the school to pick up the other 5 kiddos from school.
Then started the house pick-up and get-ready for the birthday party!
It's been a BUSY two days, but last night we folded into bed at 8:30! And slept (mostly, despite a few child-wakings) until 7am :).
Today Michael is headed to a funeral in the afternoon, but most of the day is just going to be relaxing and playing with the kids.
A HUGE THANK YOU to April for coming with me yesterday AND for the beautiful birthday cake! You made my day and you made Brianna's birthday extra special with the cake and your whole family by coming to celebrate with us!
Thursday, January 06, 2011
the run down
School for 5
KAD (mom's morning out) for 1
Pediatrician visits for 2
Lunch with Dad (and 2)
Pick up KAD
Home for an hour
nap (kids, not me! DARN!)
Pick up at school for 5
Empty van of 8 carseats and all the 'fun stuff' that goes with kids
Empty van of a wheelchair and 3 strollers
6 kids picked up oranges and threw them in the trash while I cleaned out the van
Speech for 2
Dinner for 8
Baths for 7
Bed for 8
Then my mom came over and Dad and I drove a little over an hour because there was a miscommunication and Michael couldn't sign all the car paperwork.
Did I mention that Mike was only home for about 20 minutes today? BUSY DAY!! :)
Did I mention that Mike was only home for about 20 minutes today? BUSY DAY!! :)
We now have a new (used) 15 passenger van!
And I'm exhausted :)
Tomorrow is an echo for Aleksa, x-rays for two kids and bloodwork for 2 kids and a sweet homeschooler from church is going to come with me to "supervise" the kids not in the x-rays. YAY!
Tomorrow night is a BIRTHDAY PARTY for sweet Brianna! Unfortunately, most of our guests are sick. But we will party anyway :D
5:30 am is not even 6 hours away...
Multiple kids-- one appointment!
Yesterday I received this question:
Rachel has left a new comment on your post "Adventures in a different type of blogging":
I'm curious how you handle doctor's appointments when more than one child comes? How do you focus on each child's appointment and talk to the doctor while still doing "crowd control"? We're about to have a second special little one and I know that both of them will continue to have a lot of appointments and I'm not sure how to manage that.
There's two different ways I can do it. If it's anywhere from 1-3 kids that are coming with me (at the moment... but I think this number is about to rise), then I am comfortable going to the appointment on my own and cycling through the kids and taking care of everything. If I have 4 or more kids coming along, though, I will bring a grandparent or babysitter along to help.
For times I'm flying solo, I strongly suggest a stroller if there's more than one that requires a constant eye. Wednesday's ENT appointments, for example, went very smoothly because I had my mom with me and I had the triple stroller along. Emma was content to sit in the stroller until her turn (last). Brianna is independent and doesn't need wheels. The two boys also were in the stroller and we did the "baby swap" throughout the visit.
Having medical records at the touch of a button with a blog will be REALLY helpful because I won't have to say "I don't remember when his tubes were... June? July? Oh, right... it was almost August (Oops!)." Instead everyone's info "should" be readily accessible. I always bring a few books and if there's someone that I know is particularly irritable at doctor's visits then I try to find something special for them. For a while we had a Baby Einsteins "mp3 player" with a caterpillar handle. Emma was ONLY allowed to play with that toy during doctor's visits! My kids especially love photo albums with pictures of the family, so those stayed in my car for a while.
I also set up expectations for the kids during visits. Rather than going with their Whims during appointments, I also tell them "no, wait, sit nicely, etc" instead of arguing with the child. A second request (of the same) generally gets a response of "I already told you, now it just needs to be happen."
I teach the kids from their first visit that they don't play on the floor, climb on things, or mess with the doctor's equipment. I usually keep a 'restaurant' pack of crayons in my purse so they can draw on the paper covering the table.
The kids get 'used to' having to behave while we have a different one being seen. Yes, there are multiple disabled kids. No, I don't let them get away with anything that a typical kid wouldn't be allowed to do! :)
Hope that helps, tho that's a much less 'regimented ' approach than you may have been looking for. Blessings!
Rachel has left a new comment on your post "Adventures in a different type of blogging":
I'm curious how you handle doctor's appointments when more than one child comes? How do you focus on each child's appointment and talk to the doctor while still doing "crowd control"? We're about to have a second special little one and I know that both of them will continue to have a lot of appointments and I'm not sure how to manage that.
There's two different ways I can do it. If it's anywhere from 1-3 kids that are coming with me (at the moment... but I think this number is about to rise), then I am comfortable going to the appointment on my own and cycling through the kids and taking care of everything. If I have 4 or more kids coming along, though, I will bring a grandparent or babysitter along to help.
For times I'm flying solo, I strongly suggest a stroller if there's more than one that requires a constant eye. Wednesday's ENT appointments, for example, went very smoothly because I had my mom with me and I had the triple stroller along. Emma was content to sit in the stroller until her turn (last). Brianna is independent and doesn't need wheels. The two boys also were in the stroller and we did the "baby swap" throughout the visit.
Having medical records at the touch of a button with a blog will be REALLY helpful because I won't have to say "I don't remember when his tubes were... June? July? Oh, right... it was almost August (Oops!)." Instead everyone's info "should" be readily accessible. I always bring a few books and if there's someone that I know is particularly irritable at doctor's visits then I try to find something special for them. For a while we had a Baby Einsteins "mp3 player" with a caterpillar handle. Emma was ONLY allowed to play with that toy during doctor's visits! My kids especially love photo albums with pictures of the family, so those stayed in my car for a while.
I also set up expectations for the kids during visits. Rather than going with their Whims during appointments, I also tell them "no, wait, sit nicely, etc" instead of arguing with the child. A second request (of the same) generally gets a response of "I already told you, now it just needs to be happen."
I teach the kids from their first visit that they don't play on the floor, climb on things, or mess with the doctor's equipment. I usually keep a 'restaurant' pack of crayons in my purse so they can draw on the paper covering the table.
The kids get 'used to' having to behave while we have a different one being seen. Yes, there are multiple disabled kids. No, I don't let them get away with anything that a typical kid wouldn't be allowed to do! :)
Hope that helps, tho that's a much less 'regimented ' approach than you may have been looking for. Blessings!
No afraid of naked :)
I love all the comments about the babydoll undressing! Some of you totally cracked me up :)
Here's a little more info/ answers to commenters' questions...
No, I'm not afraid of naked! LOL! I only dislike them undressing the baby dolls since it's purely deatructive at the moment. They aren't interested in changing their clothes, just on stripping the dolls.
The two kids doing it are actually both pretty good with fine motor. Aleksa undresses and dresses herself with very little assistance needed aside from helping get things on the right way (not backward). Lynae can also take most of her clothes off but isn't quite to dressing herself yet...
Anyway, love the suggestions and ideas... keep them coming and I love to hear your own experiences with naked tribes of Barbies and Groovy girls!
Wednesday, January 05, 2011
He's sleeping...
I took my laptop into Wesley's room and just sat next to him typing so he knew I was there, but I wasn't interacting directly with him (keeping him awake and making him notice when I left). I typed up the Q&A post (below) and by the time Michael and Kristopher got home, he'd just fallen asleep. Now he's in a good sweet slumber and tomorrow will be a new day.
Mary-- I do sing to my kids constantly (and half of them aren't real songs LOL) but tonight I felt like bringing him out of his room would be a bad idea since he was REALLY tired and needs to learn that that's where we sleep... And Brianna was already asleep in there when he started crying. She's not 100% quite yet and was really tired. So, tonight, he got the CD player singing and just my firm hand on his arm then just my presence next to him. He did great once I got my own attitude fixed :)
It's great to have so many people that really understand what it's like to have a new little one home that can't express themselves and just don't understand what's happening. I don't expect him to be grateful for us bringing him home. In fact if anything I think he should be resentful based on the limited knowledge he has about the situation (his own fate, etc). But it doesn't make it all that much easier to deal with a child that's throwing an all-out fit and fighting you at every move.
Mary-- I do sing to my kids constantly (and half of them aren't real songs LOL) but tonight I felt like bringing him out of his room would be a bad idea since he was REALLY tired and needs to learn that that's where we sleep... And Brianna was already asleep in there when he started crying. She's not 100% quite yet and was really tired. So, tonight, he got the CD player singing and just my firm hand on his arm then just my presence next to him. He did great once I got my own attitude fixed :)
It's great to have so many people that really understand what it's like to have a new little one home that can't express themselves and just don't understand what's happening. I don't expect him to be grateful for us bringing him home. In fact if anything I think he should be resentful based on the limited knowledge he has about the situation (his own fate, etc). But it doesn't make it all that much easier to deal with a child that's throwing an all-out fit and fighting you at every move.
Questions and Answers
Feel free to post in comments if you have a question-- I will try to post answers when I can. Here's one from this week:
Q: Hope Anne has left a new comment on your post "The culprit!":
Meredith, would you mind when you have a minute explaing about some of the "strict boundaries" you had for Alexsa right from the start, and how you implemented those? Or if you don't want to do it publicly, would you drop me a line? I expect we are going to have some definite CHALLENGING behavoirs with our little gal. ;0-) And I want to learn what your tips are. THANKS!
A: When visiting with Aleksa, we knew she would test boundaries as far as she could. She had several 'habits' that we knew wouldn't fly with our crew and at our house.
One of those things was looking at us and running wherever she wanted to go with the "pixie grin" on her face. She also would take any and all food offered to her and shove it-- whole-- into her mouth. Then she would gag and sputter and spit it back into her hand and hand it to us, then take it again and reingest it. Not only dangerous with choking, but disgusting :). Aleksa ate like an animal. Face in the bowl, not chewing, swallowing things whole and wearing half of it. It was a mess, not safe, and wasted a ton of food since she was wearing it or it was on the floor.
She hasn't run since we tog home-- tho she hasn't had much opportunity to either. I'm sure it'll happen, but for now, she's adjusting and possibly due to the other boundaries we've set, she hasn't tested that one yet.
The food we are working on and I'll leave for another post, tho I do address the behavior part of it below (not function-- but we are cutting things up and keeping a tight 'reign' on how much she can shove in her mouth at a time). Here are a few other things that I did immediately with her to set firm boundaries and help us all have a better adjustment...
The very first thing I did when I picked her up from the orphanage was "win." Yep, I said to her "I'm in charge, and you will obey." How? I put a seatbelt on her! We had a 2 1/2 hour drive (which turned into almost 5 hours because of snow and traffic) ahead of us and I immediately buckled her in the car. She HATED IT. She fought me, screamed, begged me to unbuckle it, etc. At one point she'd squirmed so much, and the roads were so bumpy that the belt was constantly locked, that I had to unbuckle it, loosen it, and rebuckle it. OH MY GOODNESS! You'd have thought I loosed a wild animal! She went full force lunging to get out of that seat! She wanted to grab the light-up controls at the front of the car (A/C and radio, etc) since it was dark out. I (once again) had to seriously wrestle her back into the seat and asked the driver to pull over so I could rebuckle her since the roads were so bumpy I couldn't even pull the seatbelt out without it locking.
For the first 40 min (including the belt-locking episode) the "inspector" (like a social worker) was next to Aleksa in the car. He asked, through our interpreter, if I was happy. He seemed SCARED. :) I said "YES!" I'm not sure what he thought of that, but the adoption was final and I had custody, so at that point... his opinion didn't matter :D
I never again had to struggle with the idea of wearing a seatbelt after that trip. No complaints about the carseat since she's been home (she's in a 5-pt Nautilus that goes up to 65 lbs in the harness). She learned in that trip that she will wear a seatbelt. Period. No more questions!
Some of the other things we quickly set was a boundary to keep her from going "up the step" into the kitchenette area of the apartment. We were in a 20x12 studio apartment with 2 burners, a sink and a minifridge. In that little space, I wanted to be SURE she couldn't get to the stove or other hot items. She'd go up the step, I'd put her down (firmly) the step, tell her NO (Nyet) and if she did it again, she got moved further away. She was already very familiar with the idea of time-out and YES she got a few in those very first days. She learned quickly not to go up the step. She would stand by it until she had permission to go up since you had to go that way to get to the bathroom as well. We also didn't have to worry about her playing in the bathroom since it killed two birds with one stone.
Once we got home, we have a baby gate on our kitchen but I rarely actually lock it all the way unless I'll be out of sight of the opening. She has not had any issues staying in the family room and playroom while that gate is unlocked. She learned in Ukraine that there would be boundaries on where she was allowed to be and she transferred that EASILY back home. She also has not gone into the bathroom without asking (which isn't gated) and seems to have transferred that boundary as well. I DO believe she had some boundaries at the institution, but we had to establish those for ourselves for it to 'transfer' that we, too, would have boundaries.
Another big area was that she expected food IMMEDIATELY. In the institution, food was served in a different building from the sleeping or daytime (Watching TV) buildings. When food was ready, the girls went there. They didn't wait. They were served, ate whatever was in sight, and left. This left us with two things: one, she didn't understand having to wait while food cooked, and two, she couldn't wrap her mind around a grocery store or restaurant or even roadside-stand where there was food that SHE couldn't eat IMMEDIATELY.
In our tiny apartment, removal from me while cooking wasn't a possibility. We had a tiny table with one chair which she quickly claimed as hers. She'd sit there then start banging the table and crying while I cooked. We'd move the chair away from the table and tell her no, she had to wait. If she continued I'd make her leave the chair and sit on the bed. If she still continued, I'd move the chair itself out of the room (into the bathroom) so it was out of sight and might help show that food wasn't coming right now. Most of the time one of the first two, or all three would work. Twice, we then had her SIT in the chair-- in the bathroom. That needed to be done only for about 1 minute and she stopped, came out (with permission) and waited nicely for the food. I considered giving her something to snack on (and if she was legitimately hungry, such as if the meal was later than usual etc, then I would) but I decided not to start that habit. At home, the kids wait for dinner. If I give them a snack first, they won't eat dinner. Why would I start something with her that wouldn't work once home?
Now home, I've just had to say no, she needs to wait, and she's done great. Now... whining between bites or eating in any civilized manner... those are taking a lot more work :)
The grocery store issue got 10,000 times better once she'd been with us a few days. The first grocery trip (when I realized this was an issue) she didn't know what to think of it and I was pretty sure I was about to be kicked out of the ritzy grocery store in Ukraine. However, when we got home and she was able to eat one of the apples I'd bought and I gave her a drink of juice and then cooked dinner... she was MUCH better. I think she understood we were bringing it home.
She's only been to the grocery store two times since then, and not at all since coming home. She behaved the second two Ukraine trips and listened for the most part when I said "Wait, later" (with signs but in English). She wasn't happy about it, but she stopped.
I won't pretend to know all the answers, GOODNESS I don't! But those are a few of the things we've done to set firm boundaries from the get-go.
IN ADDITION to those things, we've also been sure to give LOTS of hugs, kisses, snuggles and love when she does things right-- and "just because." After she's had a time out or other consequence, we've given a lot of opportunities for her to "do good" to be rewarded with hugs and kisses and love. And... occasionally some "tempts" like when her balloon went on the step and we'd leave it there for a while and she'd need to figure out that just because she wants something, if it's out of reach and not in an area she's allowed to go, that she couldn't have it. Of course, we'd only leave it there a little while and not put it there on purpose (because that's just plain mean :D).
**Michael wanted me to add that the boundaries we've used with her are always very concrete-- a door, a step, a gate... not a "line in the sand" or "don't go past the couch" type of boundary which doesn't have any definitive "one side, the other side" about it.
Q: Hope Anne has left a new comment on your post "The culprit!":
Meredith, would you mind when you have a minute explaing about some of the "strict boundaries" you had for Alexsa right from the start, and how you implemented those? Or if you don't want to do it publicly, would you drop me a line? I expect we are going to have some definite CHALLENGING behavoirs with our little gal. ;0-) And I want to learn what your tips are. THANKS!
A: When visiting with Aleksa, we knew she would test boundaries as far as she could. She had several 'habits' that we knew wouldn't fly with our crew and at our house.
One of those things was looking at us and running wherever she wanted to go with the "pixie grin" on her face. She also would take any and all food offered to her and shove it-- whole-- into her mouth. Then she would gag and sputter and spit it back into her hand and hand it to us, then take it again and reingest it. Not only dangerous with choking, but disgusting :). Aleksa ate like an animal. Face in the bowl, not chewing, swallowing things whole and wearing half of it. It was a mess, not safe, and wasted a ton of food since she was wearing it or it was on the floor.
She hasn't run since we tog home-- tho she hasn't had much opportunity to either. I'm sure it'll happen, but for now, she's adjusting and possibly due to the other boundaries we've set, she hasn't tested that one yet.
The food we are working on and I'll leave for another post, tho I do address the behavior part of it below (not function-- but we are cutting things up and keeping a tight 'reign' on how much she can shove in her mouth at a time). Here are a few other things that I did immediately with her to set firm boundaries and help us all have a better adjustment...
The very first thing I did when I picked her up from the orphanage was "win." Yep, I said to her "I'm in charge, and you will obey." How? I put a seatbelt on her! We had a 2 1/2 hour drive (which turned into almost 5 hours because of snow and traffic) ahead of us and I immediately buckled her in the car. She HATED IT. She fought me, screamed, begged me to unbuckle it, etc. At one point she'd squirmed so much, and the roads were so bumpy that the belt was constantly locked, that I had to unbuckle it, loosen it, and rebuckle it. OH MY GOODNESS! You'd have thought I loosed a wild animal! She went full force lunging to get out of that seat! She wanted to grab the light-up controls at the front of the car (A/C and radio, etc) since it was dark out. I (once again) had to seriously wrestle her back into the seat and asked the driver to pull over so I could rebuckle her since the roads were so bumpy I couldn't even pull the seatbelt out without it locking.
For the first 40 min (including the belt-locking episode) the "inspector" (like a social worker) was next to Aleksa in the car. He asked, through our interpreter, if I was happy. He seemed SCARED. :) I said "YES!" I'm not sure what he thought of that, but the adoption was final and I had custody, so at that point... his opinion didn't matter :D
I never again had to struggle with the idea of wearing a seatbelt after that trip. No complaints about the carseat since she's been home (she's in a 5-pt Nautilus that goes up to 65 lbs in the harness). She learned in that trip that she will wear a seatbelt. Period. No more questions!
Some of the other things we quickly set was a boundary to keep her from going "up the step" into the kitchenette area of the apartment. We were in a 20x12 studio apartment with 2 burners, a sink and a minifridge. In that little space, I wanted to be SURE she couldn't get to the stove or other hot items. She'd go up the step, I'd put her down (firmly) the step, tell her NO (Nyet) and if she did it again, she got moved further away. She was already very familiar with the idea of time-out and YES she got a few in those very first days. She learned quickly not to go up the step. She would stand by it until she had permission to go up since you had to go that way to get to the bathroom as well. We also didn't have to worry about her playing in the bathroom since it killed two birds with one stone.
Once we got home, we have a baby gate on our kitchen but I rarely actually lock it all the way unless I'll be out of sight of the opening. She has not had any issues staying in the family room and playroom while that gate is unlocked. She learned in Ukraine that there would be boundaries on where she was allowed to be and she transferred that EASILY back home. She also has not gone into the bathroom without asking (which isn't gated) and seems to have transferred that boundary as well. I DO believe she had some boundaries at the institution, but we had to establish those for ourselves for it to 'transfer' that we, too, would have boundaries.
Another big area was that she expected food IMMEDIATELY. In the institution, food was served in a different building from the sleeping or daytime (Watching TV) buildings. When food was ready, the girls went there. They didn't wait. They were served, ate whatever was in sight, and left. This left us with two things: one, she didn't understand having to wait while food cooked, and two, she couldn't wrap her mind around a grocery store or restaurant or even roadside-stand where there was food that SHE couldn't eat IMMEDIATELY.
In our tiny apartment, removal from me while cooking wasn't a possibility. We had a tiny table with one chair which she quickly claimed as hers. She'd sit there then start banging the table and crying while I cooked. We'd move the chair away from the table and tell her no, she had to wait. If she continued I'd make her leave the chair and sit on the bed. If she still continued, I'd move the chair itself out of the room (into the bathroom) so it was out of sight and might help show that food wasn't coming right now. Most of the time one of the first two, or all three would work. Twice, we then had her SIT in the chair-- in the bathroom. That needed to be done only for about 1 minute and she stopped, came out (with permission) and waited nicely for the food. I considered giving her something to snack on (and if she was legitimately hungry, such as if the meal was later than usual etc, then I would) but I decided not to start that habit. At home, the kids wait for dinner. If I give them a snack first, they won't eat dinner. Why would I start something with her that wouldn't work once home?
Now home, I've just had to say no, she needs to wait, and she's done great. Now... whining between bites or eating in any civilized manner... those are taking a lot more work :)
The grocery store issue got 10,000 times better once she'd been with us a few days. The first grocery trip (when I realized this was an issue) she didn't know what to think of it and I was pretty sure I was about to be kicked out of the ritzy grocery store in Ukraine. However, when we got home and she was able to eat one of the apples I'd bought and I gave her a drink of juice and then cooked dinner... she was MUCH better. I think she understood we were bringing it home.
She's only been to the grocery store two times since then, and not at all since coming home. She behaved the second two Ukraine trips and listened for the most part when I said "Wait, later" (with signs but in English). She wasn't happy about it, but she stopped.
I won't pretend to know all the answers, GOODNESS I don't! But those are a few of the things we've done to set firm boundaries from the get-go.
IN ADDITION to those things, we've also been sure to give LOTS of hugs, kisses, snuggles and love when she does things right-- and "just because." After she's had a time out or other consequence, we've given a lot of opportunities for her to "do good" to be rewarded with hugs and kisses and love. And... occasionally some "tempts" like when her balloon went on the step and we'd leave it there for a while and she'd need to figure out that just because she wants something, if it's out of reach and not in an area she's allowed to go, that she couldn't have it. Of course, we'd only leave it there a little while and not put it there on purpose (because that's just plain mean :D).
**Michael wanted me to add that the boundaries we've used with her are always very concrete-- a door, a step, a gate... not a "line in the sand" or "don't go past the couch" type of boundary which doesn't have any definitive "one side, the other side" about it.
What if...
What if, a year ago, Kristopher was sent to a foreign country. He couldn't speak the language or understand anything anyone said. He was unable to move, unable to talk even in English. He was at the mercy of strangers, living in their home, and being called their son. How might he feel about that?
Tonight's been a rough night for Wesley. I can tell he misses "normal." He was in a decent orphanage where the caretakers took care of the kids' basic needs. I don't think he had much teaching/interaction on that level but I do think he was held on one caretaker's lap a lot of the time. He loves to be held.
Tonight each time I try to leave his room he starts crying. Unless I'm touching him and talking to him, he's upset. I'll leave, give it 5 min, then go back in to reassure him that I'm here, he's ok, and remind him (in Russian) that it's time for sleeping. He calms immediately (so I know he's not genuinely scared) and then when I try to leave a few minutes later the cycle continues.
We have no idea how much Wesley understands of what's going on. We don't know what his "cognitive function" is, but though we are making things 'simple' since he's transitioning languages and environments, we are pretty sure that he's understanding a LOT of what's happening.
But he has no movement. And he has no language. And he's never been expected to express himself or his needs or wants or desires in any way (because he was in an orphanage and on a routine and whatever happens, happens en masse).
So now we have a 5, almost 6 yr old little boy who is communicating the only way he knows how... by crying his little heart out and fighting sleep.
My heart just breaks for him. Having spent almost 8 weeks in Ukraine, I understand how frustrating it is for people to talk to you-- willing you to understand-- and having NO CLUE what's being said. He's lost everything he knew. And right now, he's missing the orphanage.
In his eyes, we took him away from everything he liked and knew. He had no idea that in a few short months he'd be leaving it anyway... being transferred to the worst institution that I know of in Ukraine. He has no idea that this really WILL be a better place than where he was headed as an orphan. He has no idea that we're permanent and we love him and we want what's best for HIM.
Right now he just knows that he's not in his crib lined up against the wall with a grandmotherly lady holding him on her lap all day and the same Borscht and porridge to eat every day. He misses 'normal.'
Aleksa hasn't gone through this yet, though I expect she still may. We've been home one week tonight, and that's usually enough "vacation" for anyone before they begin to realize that this IS the new normal.
I came out here to take a break. To think through and adjust my attitude. He's crying, he's fighting me, he's being mad and mean... and my response still needs to say "I love you, you're safe, and it's ok to be sad." It's sometimes hard to do that when there's a little person that appears to be doing something *just* to frustrate you... though I know that's absolutely not the truth. Michael's with Kristopher at the church for a bit still, and I'm headed back in to little Mister. I hope he gets to sleep nice and peacefully after he decides it's ok to fall asleep tonight...
Tonight's been a rough night for Wesley. I can tell he misses "normal." He was in a decent orphanage where the caretakers took care of the kids' basic needs. I don't think he had much teaching/interaction on that level but I do think he was held on one caretaker's lap a lot of the time. He loves to be held.
Tonight each time I try to leave his room he starts crying. Unless I'm touching him and talking to him, he's upset. I'll leave, give it 5 min, then go back in to reassure him that I'm here, he's ok, and remind him (in Russian) that it's time for sleeping. He calms immediately (so I know he's not genuinely scared) and then when I try to leave a few minutes later the cycle continues.
We have no idea how much Wesley understands of what's going on. We don't know what his "cognitive function" is, but though we are making things 'simple' since he's transitioning languages and environments, we are pretty sure that he's understanding a LOT of what's happening.
But he has no movement. And he has no language. And he's never been expected to express himself or his needs or wants or desires in any way (because he was in an orphanage and on a routine and whatever happens, happens en masse).
So now we have a 5, almost 6 yr old little boy who is communicating the only way he knows how... by crying his little heart out and fighting sleep.
My heart just breaks for him. Having spent almost 8 weeks in Ukraine, I understand how frustrating it is for people to talk to you-- willing you to understand-- and having NO CLUE what's being said. He's lost everything he knew. And right now, he's missing the orphanage.
In his eyes, we took him away from everything he liked and knew. He had no idea that in a few short months he'd be leaving it anyway... being transferred to the worst institution that I know of in Ukraine. He has no idea that this really WILL be a better place than where he was headed as an orphan. He has no idea that we're permanent and we love him and we want what's best for HIM.
Right now he just knows that he's not in his crib lined up against the wall with a grandmotherly lady holding him on her lap all day and the same Borscht and porridge to eat every day. He misses 'normal.'
Aleksa hasn't gone through this yet, though I expect she still may. We've been home one week tonight, and that's usually enough "vacation" for anyone before they begin to realize that this IS the new normal.
I came out here to take a break. To think through and adjust my attitude. He's crying, he's fighting me, he's being mad and mean... and my response still needs to say "I love you, you're safe, and it's ok to be sad." It's sometimes hard to do that when there's a little person that appears to be doing something *just* to frustrate you... though I know that's absolutely not the truth. Michael's with Kristopher at the church for a bit still, and I'm headed back in to little Mister. I hope he gets to sleep nice and peacefully after he decides it's ok to fall asleep tonight...
Adventures in a different type of blogging
Each time we've adopted I've attempted to "do better" keeping track of the kids' medical visits and upcoming appointments and when each kid saw who and what was determined.
Each time it has lasted a VERY short period of time before it was "lost in the busyness".
Now I'm attempting something completely different which I hope is going to be more possible to upkeep since I can access it anywhere even from my phone, at the doctor's office, during a visit!
I've started a blog to use for our kids' medical needs. Each entry subject line is the child's name and the type of appointment, and then 2-5 lines of info about the visit including reason for visit, the outcome, and when a follow up is scheduled for. If any meds are changed or surgeries scheduled, etc...
We'll see how it goes! This will keep things automatically categorized by date and child (because Blogger keeps up with the dates and posting will be done per child).
This year, so far, we've had 7 doctor's appointments. Tomorrow we have 2 more. And yes, I mean this calendar year. It's only January 5th!
Blogger now allows "pages" which are tabs at the top of the blog (this blog has the Normal Family blog link and a few others at the top). In each tab I have each child's info. It allows 10 tabs- so a home page and 8 kids, then I have one with "scheduled appointments." In that I've written all of the appointments scheduled already for 2011, by month then by date, each child listed separately. For instance:
January 2011
1/3 Brianna 5 year Physical Rashid 10:15 PSJ
1/3 Micah 5 year physical Rashid 10:45 PSJ
1/5 Emma ENT 8AM
1/5 Brianna ENT 8AM
1/5 James ENT 8AM
1/5 Micah ENT 8AM
Those are the appointments we've had so far this week, and we ended up having a sick-visit to test Emma for Strep on the 3rd as well.
Then, for each of those appointments there's a blog entry. I chose a basic blog design with no sidebar so more 'fits' in the published space. On the very bottom of the blog is a blog archive and labels list and I "plan" to label each appointment both by specialist and by child. I haven't done that yet with the 7 appointments already in there :).
As for the appointments today... we had 4 kids see the ENT. ONE had a clean bill of health. ONE had only an upper respiratory infection which we'll "wait and see" if that's the culprit for failing the tympanogram (meaning she has fluid) in one ear. She'll follow up in one month to see if she needs an ear tube or if it's situational fluid. ONE we were told had a "foreign object" in her ear at the pediatrician a few days ago. As of today I was able to hold her still while the doctor removed said "object" which was hardened wax. She has pus and ick behind it, now on Ciprodex drops for 10 days and follow up at that time. ONE failed both tympanograms and failed the OAE (hearing test) and will be scheduled for ear tubes shortly. FUN STUFF.
(If you're wondering, Micah 'passed' everything, Emma has one ear icky, Brianna had the ick in the ear, and James is getting new tubes).
On to tomorrow when Aleksa and Wesley both go for their initial appointments with the pediatrician!
Each time it has lasted a VERY short period of time before it was "lost in the busyness".
Now I'm attempting something completely different which I hope is going to be more possible to upkeep since I can access it anywhere even from my phone, at the doctor's office, during a visit!
I've started a blog to use for our kids' medical needs. Each entry subject line is the child's name and the type of appointment, and then 2-5 lines of info about the visit including reason for visit, the outcome, and when a follow up is scheduled for. If any meds are changed or surgeries scheduled, etc...
We'll see how it goes! This will keep things automatically categorized by date and child (because Blogger keeps up with the dates and posting will be done per child).
This year, so far, we've had 7 doctor's appointments. Tomorrow we have 2 more. And yes, I mean this calendar year. It's only January 5th!
Blogger now allows "pages" which are tabs at the top of the blog (this blog has the Normal Family blog link and a few others at the top). In each tab I have each child's info. It allows 10 tabs- so a home page and 8 kids, then I have one with "scheduled appointments." In that I've written all of the appointments scheduled already for 2011, by month then by date, each child listed separately. For instance:
January 2011
1/3 Brianna 5 year Physical Rashid 10:15 PSJ
1/3 Micah 5 year physical Rashid 10:45 PSJ
1/5 Emma ENT 8AM
1/5 Brianna ENT 8AM
1/5 James ENT 8AM
1/5 Micah ENT 8AM
Those are the appointments we've had so far this week, and we ended up having a sick-visit to test Emma for Strep on the 3rd as well.
Then, for each of those appointments there's a blog entry. I chose a basic blog design with no sidebar so more 'fits' in the published space. On the very bottom of the blog is a blog archive and labels list and I "plan" to label each appointment both by specialist and by child. I haven't done that yet with the 7 appointments already in there :).
As for the appointments today... we had 4 kids see the ENT. ONE had a clean bill of health. ONE had only an upper respiratory infection which we'll "wait and see" if that's the culprit for failing the tympanogram (meaning she has fluid) in one ear. She'll follow up in one month to see if she needs an ear tube or if it's situational fluid. ONE we were told had a "foreign object" in her ear at the pediatrician a few days ago. As of today I was able to hold her still while the doctor removed said "object" which was hardened wax. She has pus and ick behind it, now on Ciprodex drops for 10 days and follow up at that time. ONE failed both tympanograms and failed the OAE (hearing test) and will be scheduled for ear tubes shortly. FUN STUFF.
(If you're wondering, Micah 'passed' everything, Emma has one ear icky, Brianna had the ick in the ear, and James is getting new tubes).
On to tomorrow when Aleksa and Wesley both go for their initial appointments with the pediatrician!
Tuesday, January 04, 2011
Dear Mom,
I cleaned my room. The kid on the couch (and the one in the doorway) proves this is a recent picture :).
I vacuumed too. Yes, I was very proud of myself! I’m sure you’ll be here tomorrow before you read this, but since you saw how awful this room looked today I thought I’d let you know that the issue is resolved.
Love, Meredith
The culprit!
Day 1 at home Aleksa undressed two baby dolls. Day 2 she undressed 5. Repeatedly.
I have a thing about naked baby dolls... I just don't like them :)
We did some redirection, redressed dolls, put them away for a while, reintroduced them with their clothes on and said "no" while pulling on the clothes, then YES when pulling them back on.
It worked.
Until today.
When Lynae started undressing baby dolls...
I have a thing about naked baby dolls... I just don't like them :)
We did some redirection, redressed dolls, put them away for a while, reintroduced them with their clothes on and said "no" while pulling on the clothes, then YES when pulling them back on.
It worked.
Until today.
When Lynae started undressing baby dolls...
Monday, January 03, 2011
Perspective
I haven't posted a bunch since coming home, though we're only on day 6 of being here. But what I have posted has been-- I believe-- a pretty true-to-life account of what life is like here with 8 little people and 2 adults and the tag-teaming process of getting to know each other. There's been some hard spots and some easy spots and some areas we were expecting the worst and hoping for the best and we were pleasantly surprised. Other areas we were thinking one thing and found something totally different. Neither of the kids' adjustment has gone exactly as we imagined it would and in some ways that's WONDERFUL and in some ways-- notsomuch.
But what I do try to be is REAL on here. Real about the struggles as well as the joys. Real about what our expectations were and what the realities are and how those coincide or differ. Real about the feelings of our kids and the things they're all doing that helps or hinders life in general. I generally just try to be real.
It's interesting to me that since I got custody of my newest kiddos I've gotten many comments that say exactly what I just posted... basically "thanks for being real." And yet, today I received a comment that said this:
"How amazing to have such a perfect life!! You never seem to have any problems at all, and your family is always so supportive and perfect and never grumbles, even when WAY too much is asked of them! How can anyone ever have so few problems??"
Before going any further, I want to add that immediately following this I received a second email from "a friend" of anonymous which apologized for the friend's comment and said that they were just talking about it.. etc.. she didn't know the friend would post that. Thank you, friend of anonymous, for the apology. I do appreciate that you are kind enough to write!! I actually found it intriguing though, and it was obviously the topic of conversation... so it made it here :)
Now, back to the comment...
A few things stood out to me, of course the "snarky" attitude was the first, but once I got past that I realized that someone that has some resentment for me somehow actually agrees that I have the "perfect life!" LOL! Ok, now seriously... take a step back and think. I'm 28 years old (for another 3 weeks) and have 8 kids. I have 7 kids in diapers right now. 6 have disabilities. 5 of my kids are adopted and we had to get 'permission' or even be chosen to have them. 4 of them have fairly severe limitations in what they're able to do for themselves. 3 of my children don't walk independently yet. 2 of the kids joined our family in the last week and still understand next to zero as far as English goes. And I'm pretty sure that after all of that there's supposed to be a partridge in a pear tree. And when you read between the lines it means that we make 3 meals a day for 8 kids on 6 different diets. We change about 35 diapers per day and YES, we pay for every one of those diapers too. We carry kids all over the place, lifting and moving and helping to walk and and and... for those that can't get around well. We have kids who will need our help for their entire lifetimes. We have kids that don't talk and don't communicate their basic needs or desires. We are BUSY and it takes a lot to "run" our household on any given day.
Seriously, I don't try to claim that my kids are perfect and I BY FAR am not perfect, but this comment stood out to me and I'm SO THANKFUL that they posted. Because aside from the laundry list of things that we deal with in a 24 hour period in our home, I am SO GLAD that I am still able to have a positive attitude and outlook in life through it that I can come across sharing our joys and trials and still seem to "have it all."
Most people don't comment to me and say I have the perfect life. In fact, many heard about our latest additions and asked if we're gluttons for punishment or something along those lines. People look at our family makeup and assume that we are miserable with life. People find out we have multiple disabled kids and PITY us.
I was very glad that that anonymous post was there. Because it said much more to me than the negatives, and showed me that even to the people that don't like me... (given from the tone of the comment) they can still see the joy in our family and in our lives. Disabilities aren't the end all. Multiple little ones isn't the end of a happy life. Diapers make landfills but not depression.
We DO have the perfect life... the one that God brought us to and that we are determined to ENJOY!
As for our families. WOW, you are SO right that we are absolutely blessed by them! We wouldn't ever just 'expect' them to step up in the ways they have recently and many times offered to hire babysitters to relieve them or make other arrangements, but you are absolutely right that they have stepped up and never grumbled. God didn't just speak this adoption to us, but to others around us that HAVE supported us. It is absolutely a blessing!
And lastly, I'm not really sure how anyone could have so few problems, but again... I think it's all just perspective. I could write about the same things that I already write about but in a different perspective. Instead of the positives of Aleksa figuring out how to lift a toilet seat and laughing about her peeing ALL OVER it while it was closed since they didn't have seats or lids on the toilets in her institution, I could write about how frustrating it was to clean it all up and how she needed a bath after peeing all over then sitting on the floor since I asked her to stop since she was covered in pee and she sat right down in it instead of just stopping leaving the room. I could write that all up as a big frustrated VENT. Or, I could get my breath back and my perspective back into where God wants it to be and be THANKFUL that she learned to lift the lid the next time and share that same experience as a tale of "oh goodness how my day went" with laughter through it and the many experiences of a day in the home of the Cornishes.
It's not that we don't have any problems... It's that our perspective isn't looking for the negatives-- though they're SURELY in there as you read. Our perspective is to share our family in a very REAL way but to continue to keep our eyes focused on Christ through it all. Before I put letters to paper (or, keyboards, rather), I have to check my perspective. Words are one thing that cannot be returned to owner, and a written word never stops at the initial print. JOY is that which our children bring us, and though I get FRUSTRATED, I wait until I can see past that and express what God had ME to learn before I vent out the frustrations to everyone else.
Do we have bad days? CERTAINLY! But the good ones far outweigh them, and as we travel this road with God as our guide, Jesus as the pilot... I have no doubt that we can find goodness and joy and teachable moments in every single day. Like, for instance, a comment that was probably written to drag me down, but unintentionally has helped me to refocus and remind me that.. we DO have the perfect life, according to God's plans for us as His followers!!
Now, back to that thing called sleep which I DEFINITELY could use a little more of. Four of my kids (minus Brianna) go back to school tomorrow so it will be an early start!
But what I do try to be is REAL on here. Real about the struggles as well as the joys. Real about what our expectations were and what the realities are and how those coincide or differ. Real about the feelings of our kids and the things they're all doing that helps or hinders life in general. I generally just try to be real.
It's interesting to me that since I got custody of my newest kiddos I've gotten many comments that say exactly what I just posted... basically "thanks for being real." And yet, today I received a comment that said this:
"How amazing to have such a perfect life!! You never seem to have any problems at all, and your family is always so supportive and perfect and never grumbles, even when WAY too much is asked of them! How can anyone ever have so few problems??"
Before going any further, I want to add that immediately following this I received a second email from "a friend" of anonymous which apologized for the friend's comment and said that they were just talking about it.. etc.. she didn't know the friend would post that. Thank you, friend of anonymous, for the apology. I do appreciate that you are kind enough to write!! I actually found it intriguing though, and it was obviously the topic of conversation... so it made it here :)
Now, back to the comment...
A few things stood out to me, of course the "snarky" attitude was the first, but once I got past that I realized that someone that has some resentment for me somehow actually agrees that I have the "perfect life!" LOL! Ok, now seriously... take a step back and think. I'm 28 years old (for another 3 weeks) and have 8 kids. I have 7 kids in diapers right now. 6 have disabilities. 5 of my kids are adopted and we had to get 'permission' or even be chosen to have them. 4 of them have fairly severe limitations in what they're able to do for themselves. 3 of my children don't walk independently yet. 2 of the kids joined our family in the last week and still understand next to zero as far as English goes. And I'm pretty sure that after all of that there's supposed to be a partridge in a pear tree. And when you read between the lines it means that we make 3 meals a day for 8 kids on 6 different diets. We change about 35 diapers per day and YES, we pay for every one of those diapers too. We carry kids all over the place, lifting and moving and helping to walk and and and... for those that can't get around well. We have kids who will need our help for their entire lifetimes. We have kids that don't talk and don't communicate their basic needs or desires. We are BUSY and it takes a lot to "run" our household on any given day.
Seriously, I don't try to claim that my kids are perfect and I BY FAR am not perfect, but this comment stood out to me and I'm SO THANKFUL that they posted. Because aside from the laundry list of things that we deal with in a 24 hour period in our home, I am SO GLAD that I am still able to have a positive attitude and outlook in life through it that I can come across sharing our joys and trials and still seem to "have it all."
Most people don't comment to me and say I have the perfect life. In fact, many heard about our latest additions and asked if we're gluttons for punishment or something along those lines. People look at our family makeup and assume that we are miserable with life. People find out we have multiple disabled kids and PITY us.
I was very glad that that anonymous post was there. Because it said much more to me than the negatives, and showed me that even to the people that don't like me... (given from the tone of the comment) they can still see the joy in our family and in our lives. Disabilities aren't the end all. Multiple little ones isn't the end of a happy life. Diapers make landfills but not depression.
We DO have the perfect life... the one that God brought us to and that we are determined to ENJOY!
As for our families. WOW, you are SO right that we are absolutely blessed by them! We wouldn't ever just 'expect' them to step up in the ways they have recently and many times offered to hire babysitters to relieve them or make other arrangements, but you are absolutely right that they have stepped up and never grumbled. God didn't just speak this adoption to us, but to others around us that HAVE supported us. It is absolutely a blessing!
And lastly, I'm not really sure how anyone could have so few problems, but again... I think it's all just perspective. I could write about the same things that I already write about but in a different perspective. Instead of the positives of Aleksa figuring out how to lift a toilet seat and laughing about her peeing ALL OVER it while it was closed since they didn't have seats or lids on the toilets in her institution, I could write about how frustrating it was to clean it all up and how she needed a bath after peeing all over then sitting on the floor since I asked her to stop since she was covered in pee and she sat right down in it instead of just stopping leaving the room. I could write that all up as a big frustrated VENT. Or, I could get my breath back and my perspective back into where God wants it to be and be THANKFUL that she learned to lift the lid the next time and share that same experience as a tale of "oh goodness how my day went" with laughter through it and the many experiences of a day in the home of the Cornishes.
It's not that we don't have any problems... It's that our perspective isn't looking for the negatives-- though they're SURELY in there as you read. Our perspective is to share our family in a very REAL way but to continue to keep our eyes focused on Christ through it all. Before I put letters to paper (or, keyboards, rather), I have to check my perspective. Words are one thing that cannot be returned to owner, and a written word never stops at the initial print. JOY is that which our children bring us, and though I get FRUSTRATED, I wait until I can see past that and express what God had ME to learn before I vent out the frustrations to everyone else.
Do we have bad days? CERTAINLY! But the good ones far outweigh them, and as we travel this road with God as our guide, Jesus as the pilot... I have no doubt that we can find goodness and joy and teachable moments in every single day. Like, for instance, a comment that was probably written to drag me down, but unintentionally has helped me to refocus and remind me that.. we DO have the perfect life, according to God's plans for us as His followers!!
Now, back to that thing called sleep which I DEFINITELY could use a little more of. Four of my kids (minus Brianna) go back to school tomorrow so it will be an early start!
Happy 5th Birthday Brianna!!
My little "tiny," as she's always been called, turned 5 today!
We started the day in a not-so-fun way because she's off of school and it was a great opportunity to get her annual physical out of the way... So off she and I and Micah went (he was waiting on his annual since I was out of the country) to the doctor.
Unfortunately, the runny nose and cough that she's been experiencing came to a crescendo today... and as she was sitting on the exam table I said to the doctor "she looks really mottled. Actually, I wonder if that's a rash on her leg and not just mottling..." So we decided to take a Strep culture for good measure. For her 5th Birthday Brianna got a prescription for antibiotics! :( Poor baby. It's impossible to know whether she has "just a runny nose" or something more going on. Hopefully she'll enjoy her extra day of winter vacation when I keep her home tomorrow and will start feeling better soon!
Because of Brianna's diagnosis, I decided I'd best bring Emma in to be tested as well. She, too, has had the snotty nose and cough. Thankfully, Emma tested negative!
We decided that though we'd take extra precautions to be sure she doesn't spread the fun stuff she's carrying, we were still going to do what we had planned for the evening with her. We went to (an EMPTY) Friendly's for dinner with Aleksa, Kristopher, Wesley, and Brianna and the kids were so excited to get ice cream after their meals! I ordered three kids' meals between the 4 kids and then the 6 of us split the 3 sundaes that came with them. We were the only customers in the restaurant!
After that, we drove out to Apopka and looked at 15 passenger vans. Unfortunately our 12 is serving us in maintenance mode only and we're going to have to take 2 vehicles to go most places even though we have enough seats. We don't have a way to bring a 3-seater and a 2-seater stroller along with all 10 of us in the 12 passenger. Thankfully, we found something that will work, is in our price range, and has 2 features that we desired but didn't have in our current van-- a tow package and a running board on the passenger side. We didn't buy it yet, but we'll talk to the loaning bank and see whether we can make that happen this next week. It's a good deal on the van and a nice trade-in value compared to our original purchase price of our 12 passenger (2 years ago). The only down-side is that it's WHITE. LOL. Oh well...
We then came back home and got home late. Kristopher is the only one that was out with us that has school tomorrow, and he does ok if it's just one night of a disrupted schedule. Brianna is usually the one we worry about but she won't be going to school anyway.
Later this week we'll have a small birthday party with family and a few close friends for Brianna and by then she should be germ free and ready to celebrate :). I can't believe she's already 5 years old!! Or, that it' JANUARY already! Time certainly flies, and our little "tiny" is getting big right before our eyes:)
Happy Birthday Brianna!! I hope you feel better soon and have a great week of celebrating with your friends at school then family at home. You are a joy and a treasure, and we love you very much!!
We started the day in a not-so-fun way because she's off of school and it was a great opportunity to get her annual physical out of the way... So off she and I and Micah went (he was waiting on his annual since I was out of the country) to the doctor.
Unfortunately, the runny nose and cough that she's been experiencing came to a crescendo today... and as she was sitting on the exam table I said to the doctor "she looks really mottled. Actually, I wonder if that's a rash on her leg and not just mottling..." So we decided to take a Strep culture for good measure. For her 5th Birthday Brianna got a prescription for antibiotics! :( Poor baby. It's impossible to know whether she has "just a runny nose" or something more going on. Hopefully she'll enjoy her extra day of winter vacation when I keep her home tomorrow and will start feeling better soon!
Because of Brianna's diagnosis, I decided I'd best bring Emma in to be tested as well. She, too, has had the snotty nose and cough. Thankfully, Emma tested negative!
We decided that though we'd take extra precautions to be sure she doesn't spread the fun stuff she's carrying, we were still going to do what we had planned for the evening with her. We went to (an EMPTY) Friendly's for dinner with Aleksa, Kristopher, Wesley, and Brianna and the kids were so excited to get ice cream after their meals! I ordered three kids' meals between the 4 kids and then the 6 of us split the 3 sundaes that came with them. We were the only customers in the restaurant!
After that, we drove out to Apopka and looked at 15 passenger vans. Unfortunately our 12 is serving us in maintenance mode only and we're going to have to take 2 vehicles to go most places even though we have enough seats. We don't have a way to bring a 3-seater and a 2-seater stroller along with all 10 of us in the 12 passenger. Thankfully, we found something that will work, is in our price range, and has 2 features that we desired but didn't have in our current van-- a tow package and a running board on the passenger side. We didn't buy it yet, but we'll talk to the loaning bank and see whether we can make that happen this next week. It's a good deal on the van and a nice trade-in value compared to our original purchase price of our 12 passenger (2 years ago). The only down-side is that it's WHITE. LOL. Oh well...
We then came back home and got home late. Kristopher is the only one that was out with us that has school tomorrow, and he does ok if it's just one night of a disrupted schedule. Brianna is usually the one we worry about but she won't be going to school anyway.
Later this week we'll have a small birthday party with family and a few close friends for Brianna and by then she should be germ free and ready to celebrate :). I can't believe she's already 5 years old!! Or, that it' JANUARY already! Time certainly flies, and our little "tiny" is getting big right before our eyes:)
Happy Birthday Brianna!! I hope you feel better soon and have a great week of celebrating with your friends at school then family at home. You are a joy and a treasure, and we love you very much!!
Saturday, January 01, 2011
Adjusting to the New Normal... and in a New Year!
It's been a busy 3 days home! Hard to believe that it's already been three days, and yet Michael said "it seems like it's been longer because everything just fell into place and is working."
To say it's been easy would be a HUGE understatement. After all, we have 8 children ages 8 and under,7 in diapers, 6 with special needs, 4 different types of diets, 3 not walking, 2 that are brand new, and I'm pretty sure there's supposed to be a partridge in a pear tree after all of that. It's been BUSY.
I shared pictures yesterday of our Christmas celebration, but no time to type along with it. Mostly because I was exhausted :). In addition to having the new kiddos, I'm (and they are too) attempting to adjust to the 7 hour time difference! It generally takes me about 3 days to be functional all day and then another 3-4 days before I'm good to go and back on 'schedule' with eating and waking and sleeping. This time I've adjusted faster, I stayed awake until about 9 last night (which is like 4am in UA). Of course that kind of killed any idea of a New Year's celebration, but it is what it is and I was wide awake and going at 4am with Wesley... who thought it was 11 and was ready to be UP.
I welcomed 2011 in with a crying son at 4am and a simultaneous SMELL of another little boy which brought me from soothing Wesley on to changing Micah's very VERY stinky little bottom and bagging it up and putting it out on the front porch. Then back to bed for a little bit (Wesley calmed quickly! YAY!) and at 6:30 I was up again and had 7 little people up, toileted, bathed, and dressed by 8 when I pulled Michael out of bed and said "help!" :) He made breakfast and bottles for the kids while I finished the last of the baths. Kristopher also decided he wanted a bath, so although I'm sure he didn't WASH and just PLAYED... we accomplished 8 kids' baths today.
After a rush of a morning, the day was nice and relaxed. After breakfast we opened up the porch and Michael and I started cleaning up Christmas gifts and paper and such that were all over the place. The living room was littered with little pieces to games and toys that needed to be put together and packaged so that the kids could get them out and play with it then put it away. We made some good headway in both the Christmas stuff and in paperwork from when I was gone and even from when we both were gone before that. Then I made a quick lunch of leftovers from our New Year's Eve dinner/Christmas dinner of ham and carrots, corn, and rolls. The rest of the dinner was gone, but the kids finished off everything except the ham at lunch today.
Micah, James and Lynae still take daily naps, and we've been putting Wesley and Aleksa down as well since they're used to it and it's a good down time for them to be able to adjust to the time difference. Brianna went tin her room as well (with Wesley) and Emma and Kristopher watched a movie (How to Train Your Dragon) for a bit. It wasn't long before we peeked in on Brianna and Wesley to discover Brianna playing and doting on him. Second 'check' she was playing Connect 4 at the table in her bedroom and he was just laying and listening to her jabber. Third check Michael let them both come out, knowing that any attempt at a nap was fruitless.
I took Emma, Kristopher, Brianna, and Wesley out to the new playset that was a gift from their grandparents for Christmas and we learned that Wesley doesn't like to swing :). I think it may come in time, but for now it freaks him out :). Emma and Brianna both love to swing, though, and we moved the "little kids' slide" to a place where we could add the second slide attachment back on it and Brianna was glad to have that.
We came back in and I worked on laundry while Mike did dishes and I also pulled out clothes of different pant sizes for W and A. Then, Aleksa got to play "fashion show" and she was very glad to try on a few pair of pants. She even went to the other end of the porch when I asked her to go show Daddy (he was in our bedroom which opens to the porch on the far end) and she patted her pants when he came to see her! She was so proud to have new clothes!
A little about the new kids and their adjustment:
Aleksa is sliding in SO well! She is listening, trying to do what's asked, and generally being sweet to the other kids! I'm AMAZED!! We've been very strict with her from the first minute that we had her out of the institution because I was really expecting her to REALLY try her boundaries. I don't know whether it's because I made such firm boundaries initially or if she just is naturally complacent (um... betting on the first!!) but she's done great with boundaries when they're consistent. She hasn't cried at the kitchen gate like she had been at the apartment in Ukraine. She's not tried to run away from us and generally when we call her (and we know she understood...) she has come. She's learned her "new name" (her bio name was Aleksandra and we changed it to Aleksa.. BUT.. she's only ever been called Sasha and Shura... ). We still use her nicknames as well, especially if we really need her attention.
Aleksa has been sweet to the other kids and given them toys, shared the few toys we'd given her at the apartment, and will even help them to do things then give the favorite toy back to them! She has had her toys snatched a few times as well, and she's yelled, but not hit or tried to snatch it back or anything. Just yelled. YAY! She hasn't yelled otherwise, either! It's been so amazing to see the little "wild animal" that we visited at the orphanage turn into a "daughter" in just a few days! She knows she's loved and I think she feels that security and is adjusting great!
Aleksa's EATING has come a LONG LONG way! There's still a ways to go, but she was able to sit down at dinner tonight and I'd cut up mini corn dogs and sweet potato fries for supper. We let her eat them with her hands (a few kids had them cut and a few whole, so we didn't do forks) and she did AWESOME! We didn't have to stop her a single time! At breakfast we were having to give her one bite at a time or she'd stuff it in her face. At lunch she ASKED before she'd take any bites. At dinner she ate like she'd had this a thousand times and was used to the routine. Amazing... seriously, that is ONE day... Of course there's still much to come, but she has a desire to please, and is really trying to learn what to do.
Tonight we all went on a walk and she walked holding Michael's hand without any difficulty whatsoever. She hasn't been overly friendly to strangers, except that she would willingly go with anyone. She hasn't tried to hug and kiss on people or anything of that nature until tonight when we stopped at someone's house on our walk. We were just standing out in the road and at first she did what she usually does... told them "pakakakakaka" and waved. When that didn't work (we didn't start walking) she started blowing kisses. Eventually, after we continued to talk, she ran over and hugged her, then wanted to be picked up and wrapped her legs around our neighbor. Thankfully, we know this neighbor fairly well and I don't think either one of them minded :). I was surprised a bit, but of course she has no distinction of a 'friend' and of a family and of a stranger, etc... I was actually glad to see her react positively to a stranger since most had gotten either a "let's go with you" or a cold shoulder and a "pakakakaka" (paka is bye in Russian, so Paka Paka is a usual goodbye between friends or children).
She appears to be happy, is playing and interacting with us and the kids, and is testing out to see what boundaries are what and listening as we set new ones. Again-- AMAZING. God is SO good!! AND... she's been dry all day today! She hasn't asked to go to the bathroom, but we usually take the kids several times during the day and she has been dry every time and gone in the toilet. I'm hoping that she will continue to use the toilet and not her diaper, but I won't be moving her to just underwear until she's been home a few weeks and we've had more outings as well as more BMs that are successfully deposited in the toilet. Until then, the pull up is a good backup and it's not so hard on her either.
Wesley... he's so sweet :). Wesley is doing well, though he's had a different set of things to adjust to. Wesley is used to being HELD. I know it's strange to even think about, but he was one of the orphanage 'favorites' from the sound of it, and he was the underdog and not expected to live as a baby. He has had a few times where he's SURE that he's supposed to be held, but it just wasn't possible. In those instances he's gotten nice and mad, but then gets over it in about 20 seconds once paid attention! He loves being around the other kids and there was an instant connection between him and Brianna. She's enjoying having him here already! And I think he sees her as "safe" whereas James is a bit noisy and wild for him (he's cried when James came over a few times LOL, but James is definitely safe as well- just noisier :) ).
James came to us with an adaptive stroller that he'd used for preschool the previous year, but since he's been walking for several months now, we haven't even touched the stroller. We pulled it out of the garage on day 1 home and adjusted it for Wesley, and with a few more tweaks here and there, it has provided us a GREAT seating option for him here at the house! Wesley likes to sit up and be able to see everyone and every thing, but in a stroller he's slumped over and in the infant/toddler rocker that we have which has a 3 pt harness he's practically laying down in it. The adaptive stroller/wheelchair gets him upright and supports him great! We are so glad we have it, since normally it would take up to 6 months after coming home to be able to get something with proper support.
Wesley loves to be held and has shown a huge preference toward me than being with anyone else which is a GREAT thing in the 'bonding' world! Yesterday with all 4 grandparents and Michael here and the other 7 kids... any time I spoke or came near enough for him to see me, he was fussing and wanting to come to me. Though I admit I was glad when he was happy with someone else for a moment at times, I was glad to know that he's got a preference to mommy than to a stranger and he expressed that (very loudly at times) yesterday. I didn't mind taking him, of course!
Wesley is also doing much better with bed times. In Ukraine I had to rock him to sleep every night and sometimes several times DURING the night. Since coming home we've gotten into a bit of a routine tho it's been only 3 nights. I put him down in the same way and say the same things and if he cries I'm right back at his side the first several times he cries. As he's continued to turn on the water works, I'd delay just a little in going in, and eventually sometimes had to let him just cry for a few and get it out of his system so he'd be ready to settle down when I went back in. Tonight I laid him in bed and did the routine of staying in the room and talking to Kristopher and Brianna a few minutes, turning on music and a small lamp and then left the room and-- no tears! He did cry when Kristopher went to bed 40 minutes later, but I went in and calmed him and "repositioned" him and he quieted back down. I left and he didn't start back up.
Both the kids are adjusting SO well! I'm so glad that things are going well, and I know that God's hand has been on our adjustment. It will continue to be tough, especially on days when all 8 kids are here with me and Michael's at work. But these initial days of adjusting are generally the HARDEST (until, of course, the honeymoon is over and the kids decide to let their inner demons come out for a bit... but we'll be ready for that too...). We are so thankful that our fears are unfounded and that though it's BUSY around here with so many little ones, that God's peace is on it all and we can still sit down at 8pm and say "I'm so glad we've done this all, and I'm glad that it's YOU (our spouse) that I'm doing it with!"
God is good-- ALL the time. We are blessed and ready for whatever 2011 has for us. When you stand in the shadow of the cross and look toward God, the fears roll away. He has it all under control!
Blessings to everyone and I pray you have had an amazing start to 2011!
To say it's been easy would be a HUGE understatement. After all, we have 8 children ages 8 and under,7 in diapers, 6 with special needs, 4 different types of diets, 3 not walking, 2 that are brand new, and I'm pretty sure there's supposed to be a partridge in a pear tree after all of that. It's been BUSY.
I shared pictures yesterday of our Christmas celebration, but no time to type along with it. Mostly because I was exhausted :). In addition to having the new kiddos, I'm (and they are too) attempting to adjust to the 7 hour time difference! It generally takes me about 3 days to be functional all day and then another 3-4 days before I'm good to go and back on 'schedule' with eating and waking and sleeping. This time I've adjusted faster, I stayed awake until about 9 last night (which is like 4am in UA). Of course that kind of killed any idea of a New Year's celebration, but it is what it is and I was wide awake and going at 4am with Wesley... who thought it was 11 and was ready to be UP.
I welcomed 2011 in with a crying son at 4am and a simultaneous SMELL of another little boy which brought me from soothing Wesley on to changing Micah's very VERY stinky little bottom and bagging it up and putting it out on the front porch. Then back to bed for a little bit (Wesley calmed quickly! YAY!) and at 6:30 I was up again and had 7 little people up, toileted, bathed, and dressed by 8 when I pulled Michael out of bed and said "help!" :) He made breakfast and bottles for the kids while I finished the last of the baths. Kristopher also decided he wanted a bath, so although I'm sure he didn't WASH and just PLAYED... we accomplished 8 kids' baths today.
After a rush of a morning, the day was nice and relaxed. After breakfast we opened up the porch and Michael and I started cleaning up Christmas gifts and paper and such that were all over the place. The living room was littered with little pieces to games and toys that needed to be put together and packaged so that the kids could get them out and play with it then put it away. We made some good headway in both the Christmas stuff and in paperwork from when I was gone and even from when we both were gone before that. Then I made a quick lunch of leftovers from our New Year's Eve dinner/Christmas dinner of ham and carrots, corn, and rolls. The rest of the dinner was gone, but the kids finished off everything except the ham at lunch today.
Micah, James and Lynae still take daily naps, and we've been putting Wesley and Aleksa down as well since they're used to it and it's a good down time for them to be able to adjust to the time difference. Brianna went tin her room as well (with Wesley) and Emma and Kristopher watched a movie (How to Train Your Dragon) for a bit. It wasn't long before we peeked in on Brianna and Wesley to discover Brianna playing and doting on him. Second 'check' she was playing Connect 4 at the table in her bedroom and he was just laying and listening to her jabber. Third check Michael let them both come out, knowing that any attempt at a nap was fruitless.
I took Emma, Kristopher, Brianna, and Wesley out to the new playset that was a gift from their grandparents for Christmas and we learned that Wesley doesn't like to swing :). I think it may come in time, but for now it freaks him out :). Emma and Brianna both love to swing, though, and we moved the "little kids' slide" to a place where we could add the second slide attachment back on it and Brianna was glad to have that.
We came back in and I worked on laundry while Mike did dishes and I also pulled out clothes of different pant sizes for W and A. Then, Aleksa got to play "fashion show" and she was very glad to try on a few pair of pants. She even went to the other end of the porch when I asked her to go show Daddy (he was in our bedroom which opens to the porch on the far end) and she patted her pants when he came to see her! She was so proud to have new clothes!
A little about the new kids and their adjustment:
Aleksa is sliding in SO well! She is listening, trying to do what's asked, and generally being sweet to the other kids! I'm AMAZED!! We've been very strict with her from the first minute that we had her out of the institution because I was really expecting her to REALLY try her boundaries. I don't know whether it's because I made such firm boundaries initially or if she just is naturally complacent (um... betting on the first!!) but she's done great with boundaries when they're consistent. She hasn't cried at the kitchen gate like she had been at the apartment in Ukraine. She's not tried to run away from us and generally when we call her (and we know she understood...) she has come. She's learned her "new name" (her bio name was Aleksandra and we changed it to Aleksa.. BUT.. she's only ever been called Sasha and Shura... ). We still use her nicknames as well, especially if we really need her attention.
Aleksa has been sweet to the other kids and given them toys, shared the few toys we'd given her at the apartment, and will even help them to do things then give the favorite toy back to them! She has had her toys snatched a few times as well, and she's yelled, but not hit or tried to snatch it back or anything. Just yelled. YAY! She hasn't yelled otherwise, either! It's been so amazing to see the little "wild animal" that we visited at the orphanage turn into a "daughter" in just a few days! She knows she's loved and I think she feels that security and is adjusting great!
Aleksa's EATING has come a LONG LONG way! There's still a ways to go, but she was able to sit down at dinner tonight and I'd cut up mini corn dogs and sweet potato fries for supper. We let her eat them with her hands (a few kids had them cut and a few whole, so we didn't do forks) and she did AWESOME! We didn't have to stop her a single time! At breakfast we were having to give her one bite at a time or she'd stuff it in her face. At lunch she ASKED before she'd take any bites. At dinner she ate like she'd had this a thousand times and was used to the routine. Amazing... seriously, that is ONE day... Of course there's still much to come, but she has a desire to please, and is really trying to learn what to do.
Tonight we all went on a walk and she walked holding Michael's hand without any difficulty whatsoever. She hasn't been overly friendly to strangers, except that she would willingly go with anyone. She hasn't tried to hug and kiss on people or anything of that nature until tonight when we stopped at someone's house on our walk. We were just standing out in the road and at first she did what she usually does... told them "pakakakakaka" and waved. When that didn't work (we didn't start walking) she started blowing kisses. Eventually, after we continued to talk, she ran over and hugged her, then wanted to be picked up and wrapped her legs around our neighbor. Thankfully, we know this neighbor fairly well and I don't think either one of them minded :). I was surprised a bit, but of course she has no distinction of a 'friend' and of a family and of a stranger, etc... I was actually glad to see her react positively to a stranger since most had gotten either a "let's go with you" or a cold shoulder and a "pakakakaka" (paka is bye in Russian, so Paka Paka is a usual goodbye between friends or children).
She appears to be happy, is playing and interacting with us and the kids, and is testing out to see what boundaries are what and listening as we set new ones. Again-- AMAZING. God is SO good!! AND... she's been dry all day today! She hasn't asked to go to the bathroom, but we usually take the kids several times during the day and she has been dry every time and gone in the toilet. I'm hoping that she will continue to use the toilet and not her diaper, but I won't be moving her to just underwear until she's been home a few weeks and we've had more outings as well as more BMs that are successfully deposited in the toilet. Until then, the pull up is a good backup and it's not so hard on her either.
Wesley... he's so sweet :). Wesley is doing well, though he's had a different set of things to adjust to. Wesley is used to being HELD. I know it's strange to even think about, but he was one of the orphanage 'favorites' from the sound of it, and he was the underdog and not expected to live as a baby. He has had a few times where he's SURE that he's supposed to be held, but it just wasn't possible. In those instances he's gotten nice and mad, but then gets over it in about 20 seconds once paid attention! He loves being around the other kids and there was an instant connection between him and Brianna. She's enjoying having him here already! And I think he sees her as "safe" whereas James is a bit noisy and wild for him (he's cried when James came over a few times LOL, but James is definitely safe as well- just noisier :) ).
James came to us with an adaptive stroller that he'd used for preschool the previous year, but since he's been walking for several months now, we haven't even touched the stroller. We pulled it out of the garage on day 1 home and adjusted it for Wesley, and with a few more tweaks here and there, it has provided us a GREAT seating option for him here at the house! Wesley likes to sit up and be able to see everyone and every thing, but in a stroller he's slumped over and in the infant/toddler rocker that we have which has a 3 pt harness he's practically laying down in it. The adaptive stroller/wheelchair gets him upright and supports him great! We are so glad we have it, since normally it would take up to 6 months after coming home to be able to get something with proper support.
Wesley loves to be held and has shown a huge preference toward me than being with anyone else which is a GREAT thing in the 'bonding' world! Yesterday with all 4 grandparents and Michael here and the other 7 kids... any time I spoke or came near enough for him to see me, he was fussing and wanting to come to me. Though I admit I was glad when he was happy with someone else for a moment at times, I was glad to know that he's got a preference to mommy than to a stranger and he expressed that (very loudly at times) yesterday. I didn't mind taking him, of course!
Wesley is also doing much better with bed times. In Ukraine I had to rock him to sleep every night and sometimes several times DURING the night. Since coming home we've gotten into a bit of a routine tho it's been only 3 nights. I put him down in the same way and say the same things and if he cries I'm right back at his side the first several times he cries. As he's continued to turn on the water works, I'd delay just a little in going in, and eventually sometimes had to let him just cry for a few and get it out of his system so he'd be ready to settle down when I went back in. Tonight I laid him in bed and did the routine of staying in the room and talking to Kristopher and Brianna a few minutes, turning on music and a small lamp and then left the room and-- no tears! He did cry when Kristopher went to bed 40 minutes later, but I went in and calmed him and "repositioned" him and he quieted back down. I left and he didn't start back up.
Both the kids are adjusting SO well! I'm so glad that things are going well, and I know that God's hand has been on our adjustment. It will continue to be tough, especially on days when all 8 kids are here with me and Michael's at work. But these initial days of adjusting are generally the HARDEST (until, of course, the honeymoon is over and the kids decide to let their inner demons come out for a bit... but we'll be ready for that too...). We are so thankful that our fears are unfounded and that though it's BUSY around here with so many little ones, that God's peace is on it all and we can still sit down at 8pm and say "I'm so glad we've done this all, and I'm glad that it's YOU (our spouse) that I'm doing it with!"
God is good-- ALL the time. We are blessed and ready for whatever 2011 has for us. When you stand in the shadow of the cross and look toward God, the fears roll away. He has it all under control!
Blessings to everyone and I pray you have had an amazing start to 2011!
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